Thursday, September 22, 2011

More Ways to Make a More Healthy Office

• Instead of taking the elevator at your office building, try calling in sick and going to the gym instead.

• Instead of photocopies, make yogacopies.

• One simple way to get your heart rate up is to do such a poor job that you’re constantly worried you’ll get fired.

• Excuse yourself from a staff meeting and go run a marathon.

• Invest in some carpet skates and sliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiide to your next meeting.

• Make Mondays optional.

• Keep a bucket of hand sanitizer in the lobby and encourage people to dip their hands in it regularly.

• Replace harsh flurescent office lights with complete and utter darkness.

• If you’re going to offer donuts in the break room, at least make sure each one is first injected with a flu shot.

• Get a hands-free headset for your phone (wait… that was for my list of how to annoy the hell out of your co-workers).

• Drink more water by running a garden hose from restroom to your desk.

• Start a Health Eating Club. Yeah, it’s gonna be lonely but you’re used to loneliness, right?

• Replace your office chair with a personal trainer.

• It’s simple to turn an ordinary coffee maker into a juicer. Just invent a really small juicer that fits in the coffee filter basket thingy.


  1. Words just can't express how much I enjoy your musings... or how warped your mind is... or how warped MINE must be since I enjoy your blog so dang much...

  2. LOL you are a hoot. Hoot wow did I just type that?

  3. I count on you to make me laugh. And you did. Way to be awesome. :)

  4. Run Garden Hose from restroom to your desk = Hilarious!

  5. oooh IM in for the garden hose.

    Will that count toward my Brita Challenge?



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