This Poo's For You

As I was driving my youngest daughter to school this morning, I came up alongside a truck sporting a bunch of interesting signage on the back and sides. Apparently, this young guy was a part of the “On Doody” franchise. In case you’re not familiar with the “On Doody” brand, here’s some of the sales pitch plastered all over this poor b*stard’s vehicle: “Because Dogs Can’t Flush!,” “They Poop, We Scoop!” “Our Business is ‘Picking Up’”. Whoever provides the marketing material for “On Doody” could get a second job filling in at Jack Sh*t, Gettin’ Fit Enterprises.

Anyway, I can see this guy a year or so ago, watching an infomercial or reading a brochure about this fantastic career opportunity. For a small initial investment, he could have an ownership position where he could…

• Meet interesting people
• Set your own hours
• Not get trapped in a stuffy office or cubicle
• Be your own boss

I got news for you, Poopy: even if you’re making halfway decent money, if you’re tromping around in a stranger’s backyard collecting dried-up excrement, then you’ve got a sh*tty job.

So if you’re struggling with worrisome weigh-ins, fighting off hunger pains with a baseball bat, sore all over from trying to make your muscles do things they’re not in the mood to do, or weary of battling your worse inner demons, take a deep breath and give thanks that you’re not “On Doody” today.