Thursday, May 21, 2009

This Poo's For You

As I was driving my youngest daughter to school this morning, I came up alongside a truck sporting a bunch of interesting signage on the back and sides. Apparently, this young guy was a part of the “On Doody” franchise. In case you’re not familiar with the “On Doody” brand, here’s some of the sales pitch plastered all over this poor b*stard’s vehicle: “Because Dogs Can’t Flush!,” “They Poop, We Scoop!” “Our Business is ‘Picking Up’”. Whoever provides the marketing material for “On Doody” could get a second job filling in at Jack Sh*t, Gettin’ Fit Enterprises.

Anyway, I can see this guy a year or so ago, watching an infomercial or reading a brochure about this fantastic career opportunity. For a small initial investment, he could have an ownership position where he could…

  • Meet interesting people
  • Set your own hours
  • Not get trapped in a stuffy office or cubicle
  • Be your own boss

I got news for you, Poopy: even if you’re making halfway decent money, if you’re tromping around in a stranger’s backyard collecting dried-up excrement, then you’ve got a sh*tty job.

So if you’re struggling with worrisome weigh-ins, fighting off hunger pains with a baseball bat, sore all over from trying to make your muscles do things they’re not in the mood to do, or weary of battling your worse inner demons, take a deep breath and give thanks that you’re not “On Doody” today.


  1. It could always be worse. You could be getting fired from the poo job. Oh, what a crushing blow to the self-esteem that would be. I bet they'd fire you in a clever way though. Like a brown slip instead of a pink slip.

  2. About 11 years ago we used a service similar to On Doody. It was the best money I ever spent. They were fast, came in teams, and it made our lives a lot easier. They raked in the dough.

    And being the owner of 3 dogs, I'm always on Doody. Sadly, I'll never get fired from that job but I do delegate to my poor son on occasion.

    It is one of those jobs that always made me laugh, though. Can you imagine seeing that on a resume?

    I think I'd rather be a housewife, with no salary, than picking up sh*t for a living. lol



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