Friday, May 22, 2009

A Message from Jack Sh*t's Wife, Anita

Attention fat people: will you please give me my husband back.

It seems like he spends every waking hour obsessing about his diet, working out like a demon or wasting hours and hours with this absurd blogamacallit.

The other night when he was supposed to be helping our daughter Pisa with her math homework, I caught him scribbling out a list of gibberish titled “Lowfat Recipe Names That Sound Dirty.” WTF?

And he was late picking up our other daughter Holly at her audition because he was home giggling over comments you overweight time-wasters left on his posts. Can’t you see that you people are egging this foolishness on?

It’s never been particularly easy being Mrs. Sh*t, but now it’s virtually impossible. So I’m asking for you to please quit visiting his stupid little blog thing and especially quit commenting on his ridiculous posts.

I appreciate your cooperation.

Sincerely,

Anita Sh*t

10 comments:

  1. Impossible, he makes our lives so much more entertaining in this dog-eat-dog and man-eat-everything-in-sight world.

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  2. I would love to hear that list of lowfat recipe names that sound dirty!

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  3. Love the names of your "family"...Anita Sh*t BHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Pisa Sh*t....hysterical and Holy (oops I mean Holly) Sh*t. That is freaking awesome. Dude, either you wrote this, you married your comedic twin or you are bipolar. Either way, that was a great post and gave me the laugh I needed to start today.

    Sincerely,
    An Over Weight Time Waster :-)

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  4. I can tell I'm stressed, I didn't even pick up on the names thing! Thanks for the laugh!!

    And please share the lowfat dirty sounding recipes.

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  5. jack sh*t
    anita sh*t
    pisa sh*t
    holly sh*t

    Priceless! RMFAOL!

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  6. So clever...it's a little scary.

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  7. Must have dirty sounding recipes now.

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  8. I can't stop laughing either. My advice to Jack is "balance shit" lol.

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  9. waiting for that list of recipes....

    :)

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