Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Like Barbie Says...


..."Math is hard!"

I was doodling around with my weight loss numbers, trying to find a new way to feel good about myself, when I realized that I f*cked them up six ways to Sunday.

First, I shorted myself a pound on the first week's weigh-in. It was 14.5 pounds, not 13.5 lbs. Impressive, yes, but remember that my initial weigh-in was while wearing big heavy sneakers (hey, this ain't Jack Sh*t's first rodeo, boys and girls).

Next, I owe my scale a humbe and sincere apology. I went on a blue-streak rant about it a couple of weeks ago for giving me the second-week gutshot of a 1.3 pound gain, even though I swore to all who would listen that I had been good as gold.

Turns out that I actually had a 5.2 lb. loss that week. Addition, subtraction... hey, I think I missed that week in grade school.

Finally, I shorted myself a pound on my total so far. Using this new-fangled device I learned about called a "calculator," I discovered that my true loss is 25.8 lbs. in just this side of a month. Even discounting the sneaker cheat to get the ball rolling, I think I can live with that number.

Two questions:

1. Who volunteers to go behind me and check my math going forward?
2. Did I really put a picture of Barbie on a weight loss blog?

UPDATE: Whoops, I missed a weekly weigh-in in my original calculations, so my math wasn't quite as sucky as I thought.

UPDATE 2: You really, really don't want to google "Fat Barbie."


11 comments:

  1. Dude, calculators are your friends. Use them. LOL At least it was in your favor!!

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  2. I puffy heart my calculator.

    looks like that barbie is gonna get sh*t on by that passing bird. lol

    :)tj

    oh! WTG on the 25.8!

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  3. I talked to my 7 year old about it and he said he'd do it for you even though adding and subtracting was so last year ;) But BIG KUDOS on the loss!!!

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  4. calculators and excel spreadsheets with formulas made up in the cells in them are my best friend.

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  5. WTG however it breaks down week by week! And thanks for the google warning.

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  6. Wow. You and Barbie... got something goin' on?

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  7. Oh yeah... me and B got history. I threw some of my wife's and daugters' old dolls away last summer while they were out of town and guess who got put on the semi-permanent sh*t-list. Hint: not Barbie.

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  8. I suck at math too. Lucky for me weight changes are not usually greater than what I can count on my fingers, which btw, never need recharging! :)

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  9. Ever since you posted this, I have had the song, "I'm a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world" going through my head while thinking of you. lmao ;-)

    I think I'll take your warning and NOT google fat barbie.

    I still have my childhood barbies and my sister's bubble head barbie which would be worth a lot of money had I not given her a massive haircut.

    Congrats on your awesome loss!

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  10. I cracked. I googled fat barbie. LOL. LOL. LOL.

    Lovin' the numbers mister.

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  11. Thanks jo no really I wanted that f*ing song stuck in my head.

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