Sunday, September 14, 2014

All-You-Can-Tweet Special

If you're not following me over at @JackSht on Twitter... well, you're missing out on some quality health and wellness (not to mention Life) information...

• OH GROSS! A bug just flew in my mouth! Oh wait... it was a cookie. Nevermind...

• I'm so hungry I could eat my own cooking.

• Here's an easy way to remember when to use "your" and "you're": they're completely interchangeable!

• Some people just can't take de-constructive criticism.

• Twitter tip: Always refrain from making fun of other peoples'  hopes, dreams and fears. THAT'S MY SPECIAL THING!!!!!!!!!!!!

• I am never not more proud that when I successfully include a double negative inside a tweet.  #doublenegativeking 

• Smiles are all the payment I ever need, which explains my really crappy retirement portfolio.

• Health tip: If you’re a zombie, instead of brains, why not try half brains and half cottage cheese?

• Click HERE to read my article "How to Easily Create Hyperlinks". What? It didn't work? Dammit... 

• If you don't love what you do, why do it? Oh yeah, because they give you a paycheck. Carry on! 

• When the world gives you life, make lifenade.

• Dammit! The guy that was gonna help me convert my blog to a Ponzi scheme took my money and ran off. THAT IS BS!!! 
• Happiness is the best revenge (but keying up their car is a close second). 

• Health tip: Always... wait, I meant "never"... dammit, I screwed this tweet up and now there's no way to go back and fix it!

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