Sunday, November 8, 2009

My Jokes May Get Old, But Losing Weight Never Does…


Weekly weigh-in: 210.8
Loss: -1.7
Total loss: 80.7 lbs.
Emotion: Gr8t!

An old man shuffles into a confessional, and the following conversation ensues:

Man: I am 92 years old, have a wonderful wife of 70 years, many children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. Yesterday, I picked up two college girls, hitchhiking. We went to a motel, where I had sex with each of them three times.

Priest: Are you sorry for your sins?

Man: What sins?

Priest: What kind of a Catholic are you?

Man: I'm Jewish.

Priest: Why are you telling me all this?

Man: I'm telling everybody!

The other day, I was at the grocery store engaging in my favorite hobby (reading ingredients and loudly harrumphing), when I was approached by a guy I hadn’t seen in a year or so.

Suddenly, I had the oddest sensation: I saw what other people are seeing when they look at me these days. This guy had lost fifty pounds since I’d last laid eyes on him, and the transformation was absolutely amazing. I shot a wide-eyed smile at him and exclaimed, “Man, you look fantastic!” And there was nothing convoluted or forced about the statement; he really did look terrific.

“Look who’s talking,” he replied, and that’s when it hit me like a ton of fat.

Up until now, I’ve taken all the compliments and well wishes in stride. I’ll blog about my weight until the cows get skinny, but I still have trouble talking about it to people one-on-one. But I don’t know; the experience of seeing someone else I hadn’t expected lose the weight… well, it somehow made me have a greater appreciation for my own accomplishment.

Eighty freakin’ pounds, thank you very much.

High-fiving a hobo?

Buddy, I’m high-fiving everybody!

45 comments:

  1. Holy sh*t.

    80 pounds is amazing. Congratulations!

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  2. 80 pounds is just incredible! Congratulations Jack.

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  3. Congratulations, Jack. Couldn't have happened to a sh*ttier guy! Seriously, WTG. Plus, a sincere thank you for all you've brought to the table, so to speak.

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  4. High five! You're doing great.

    I still view myself as I was so sometimes it's a bit surprising when smaller clothes fit me. And I've dropped several sizes, but it's just weird. It's getting better but I still don't see myself as other people see me.

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  5. *raising hand* Up top!

    Way to go, Jack! That is such a wonderful accomplishment!

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  6. oh and YES, I was shouting... :)

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  7. 80 lbs...amazing! Great job! I'm coming back your way (Memphis) this week...hoping for some warmer weather than here in the Northeast!

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  8. I feel ya on it being hard to accept the compliments. But you have to think you've lost a pre-teen. It's an amazing accomplishment...shout it from the rooftops!

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  9. That is amazing. Congrats on hitting yet another milestone! You rock!

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  10. Right on Jack! 80 pounds is alot to be proud of!

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  11. 80lbs is phenomenal Jack, well done!

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  12. Congratulations!!!

    That joke was hilarious!

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  13. High Five from a non-hobo!

    What a fantastic encounter. That kind of mutual back-slapping really boosts the soul.

    Gotta admit I'm getting a little nervous about the next goal. Can you just kinda stop at 89.9 lbs? That, or by "sacrifice" you mean "motorboat", in which case keep on truckin'!

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  14. WOW!!! 80 lbs!!! Fabulous! High Five times 16!

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  15. Does put it in perspective, doesn't it? It takes seeing someone else do it to give yourself full marks.

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  16. which all begs the question: are you really MOT?
    if yes then THATS why I love you so.
    if not, well, consider yourself adopted in.

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  17. Awesome! What an amazing accomplishment! You must be so damn proud of yourself!

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  18. Fantastic amount of weight you've lost..what an awesome feeling.

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  19. Just awesome Jack...you continue to inspire me...and thanks for the comment you left on my blog....I love it when someone tells me to get my act together...that's what I need to hear!! By the way, I'm taking my baby sister out to dinner for her birthday...told her she could pick anywhere she wanted, knowing you can finding healthy stuff on every menu...was totally prepared...and then she picked Golden Corral, the buffet from hell, lol. I immediately thought of you when I posted about the last time I went to Golden Corral 2-3 months ago....I remembered that you told me it doesn't have to be a death sentence...so I'm carrying you with me in my thoughts tonight. :)

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  20. watch out hobos...
    Here comes jack.
    Congratulations Jack, great job! You've lost a ten year old, (or an anorexic supermodel)
    Not easy.

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  21. Nice work, just the kind of post I needed.

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  22. You deserve every bit of the high fiving yourself!!! Isn't it cool when that actually hits home!!! You can really appreciate all you have done even more! CONGRATS! How exciting!

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  23. High Fives from Colorado. You rock!

    Please put the Oxy Clean pic back up, I miss it.

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  24. Very impressive, Jack! High five at ya!

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  25. I'm not a hobo, but *high five*!

    Have a great week,
    Lynn

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  26. Wow, 80 pounds! Awesome!

    I'm going to go throw out the crappy chocolate I've been feasting on, in your honour. Consider it my toast to you, lol.

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  27. WOOHOO! Congrats, Jack! You should high-five every single hobo you meet, man. You deserve it :)

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  28. DUDE! You're freakin' awesome! waaaay to go!

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  29. You have much to be proud of! And I totally relate to it taking a long while before actually realizing the change. It's a great feeling.

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  30. Oh, I bet the dogs are trembling!

    Way to go, Jack!

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  31. Congratulations Jack! 80 pounds gone is an awesome accomplishment!

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  32. Woo hoo! Way to go Jack!

    And well done on the realisation as well - that's got to be a milestone in itself!

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  33. Wow Jack, you've just done amazing. I love that you came along to the blog world so I can celebrate your great success with you. Also, that I get to read your great writing, it always makes me feel good to read your posts. *double high five*

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  34. fabulous jack absolutely fabulous!

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  35. I can't wait to see the picture of a oscar myer weiner on a twinkee altar in a PEZ stonehenge in sacrifice to the mighty Foolsfitness when you hit the 90 pound mark!

    * Oh, wait you said "Brazillian demi-god" not a "God among men"... never mind.

    Good going... show off. (OK good going... I'm just a bit jelous)

    At Foolsfitness we are working on closing in on a milestone... over one million excuses served... -Alan

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  36. Congratulations! That's an incredible achievement, and I'm glad you're enjoying it to the max!

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  37. dude! 80 pounds? 80 fricking pounds? KUDOS. major respect mr.sh*t

    *jealous*

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