Tuesday, February 7, 2023

Nom Nom Nom



Cannibal wasn’t his real name, of course. Everyone just called him that because… come to think of it, Wayne wasn’t sure why everyone called him Cannibal. Before he could think to ask him, the shop proprietor had gone back inside.

“Say, Cannibal. I’m just curious… why do people...”


“I was just enjoying a little lunch,” said Cannibal, gnawing on a bone. “Want a rib?”


“Ummmm,” stammered Wayne. “Beef or pork?”


“Say, Wayne,” said Cannibal, quickly changing the subject. “I was sorry to hear about what happened with your wife. I’d love to have you over for dinner sometime if you’re up for it.”


“Have me for dinner?”


“Sure,” smiled Cannibal, licking his lips. “We’ll grill out on the big pit out back. You’ll be delicious.”


“Excuse me?”


“I said it’ll be delicious.” 



From the project I'm currently working on, THE KING COLLECTED COLLECTION, a parody of the first chapter of (nearly) every Stephen King novel. 

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