Saturday, October 31, 2009

Reasons NOT to Lose Weight (Plus a Couple of Guest Posts)

Welcome to "Same Old Sh*t Saturday" where I rerun some of the older posts that mean something extra to me. It's my special way of getting out of a little work, which doesn't explain why in the hell I'm guest posting today for Michelle at Eating Journey as well as Ashley at A Daily Dose of Dieting.

Anyway, what makes this particular post special to me is that it's where this space quit being a daily diary/commentary and started really being Jack Sh*t, Gettin' Fit. It's the one that made me realize I could be completely ridiculous and it was okay. Maybe even better than okay...

Reasons NOT to Lose Weight

  • Shame to waste all my “fat” pants
  • 25-lb. bags of potato chips at Costco make unhealthy lifestyle extremely affordable
  • Time spent weight loss blogging could easily be filled with TV watching
  • Less sweaty gym clothes = less laundry
  • Might miss out on playing Santa Claus at holiday parties
  • Easier to maintain casual friendships with all those fast food drive-thru workers
  • Don’t have to answer that embarrassing “Are you losing weight?” question
  • Good excuse to wear sweatpants in public
  • Don’t have to worry about a lot of leftovers cluttering up fridge
  • Get more for your money at “all-you-can-eat” buffet
  • Answer to all life’s problems? Gravy
  • Have kick-*ss health insurance to deal with any weight-related problems
  • Have gotten good at punching new holes in belt with screwdriver
  • Guy that owns the local Ben & Jerry’s franchise really wants me back
I dunno. I make a pretty compelling argument, but I think I’m gonna stick with the plan.



  1. I could definitely be swayed. I have a feeling sweat pants are going to be all over next season's fashion shows. ;-)

  2. look at you double dipping your guest posting

  3. Wow! A triple dose today! A little taste of everything I love about Jack Sh*t. Thanks! And thanks for showing me a couple of new blogs.
    Happy Halloween!

  4. I got to admit I live in sweat pants. Maybe at my 50 pounds off mark I need to ge a friend to teach me some fashion sense. Training to be a superhero I should really start getting use to wearing the spandex now anyway.

    The laundry thing does anger me though. I hate the laundramat. I just buy more clothes from Goodwill... it's cheeper than putting 10,000 quarters in those washers and dryers.

    You forgot the plus of not looking at some woman at the gym and getting threatened by her boyfriend who has taken more growth hormones than a farm full of angus.

    At Foolsfitness we have loads of excuses and they are on sale now! We are running a special on them... we want to get rid of them. Buy one excuse get one free at Foolsfitness. All excuses must go in our blow-out event. -Alan

  5. My reasons not to get healthy is that Nestle Crunch bars are 5/$1 at the grocery right now...

    I did not buy them though. The sale ends tomorrow. MUST. STAY. STRONG.

  6. Not only ridiculous, but totally absurd, silly, outlandish, outrageous and sometimes downright bizarre, you are. We love you Jack, whether it’s Sh*t, Fit, or Wit. You’re always a hit and we know you won’t quit.

  7. You mean we are NOT supposed to do this: Good excuse to wear sweatpants in public? OH NO!!!!

    I read your second guest post & was not able to post a comment for some reason so here it is below. Going on to read the other guest post.

    Great stuff Jack, as usual! I do what you do EXCEPT chew gum. I can't handle the sorbitol stuff & used to chew it like crazy with bad tummy issues. I finally stopped cold turkey years ago & a lot of the tummy issues went away.. not all, but a lot, so those that have trouble with sorbitol & those "ol" sugar free sweeteners, be careful!

    I also love the mini meals too cause I know another one is coming up & I can wait for it!

  8. You've convinced me. I quit.

    BTW, I think my mom is obsessed with you now. She mentions you in every comment she leaves on my blog. It's hilarious.

  9. The number one reason in Wisconsin is lie. If I could survive off cheese I would. Damn I miss Wisconsin lol.

  10. I thought the answer to all of life's problems was cheese. Everything s better with cheese. Or was it... every things Gouda with cheese?

  11. reducing your carbon footprint by moving as little as possible....

  12. awesome post, nearly laughed my ass off

  13. Deisegirl: you don't even know. Designers were actually featuring sweatpants for this season. So effing ridiculous. It looked awful. But hey, I guess people can say they're in style now by wearing sweatpants (be sure to rock the heels with them!). *eye roll* I hate sweatpants. I didn't even wear them when I was pregnant so that wouldn't be a good reason for me to be overweight. I'd say a good one is 'cause you always get shotgun.

  14. Very thoughtfull post on "Reasons NOT to Lose Weight (Plus a Couple of Guest Posts)" .I'm using the methods from to reduce weight and it really works.

    Edwin- Lose 20 - Losing weight may save your life



Related Posts with Thumbnails