Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Post-Vacation Weigh-In

Weekly weigh-in: 228.7
Loss: -2.6 lbs
Total loss: 62.8 lbs.
Emotion: Not so mad

Once I got the sodium flushed out of my system and everyone off my back about skipping my weigh-in on Sunday, I managed to actually carve out a nice little loss.

I could probably dissect this loss and explain how I think I managed it, but I believe I’ll spend this space talking about yesterday’s post, which seemed to punch a lot of people’s buttons in one way or another.

I spent half my day defending my rant against people who thought I went too far and the other half accepting compliments and atta-boys about it. I took both the admonishments and the admiration with a grain of salt, which probably explains the bloated feeling I had all day.

Truthfully, I wrote that piece while I was still mad, and it certainly shows. I generally spend more time on posts than I did on that one as well. But there’s a certain satisfaction (and catharsis, I guess) of getting something out of your system like that.

I do get mad about this situation that many if not most of us have found ourselves in. I get mad that it’s such hard work, and that so much of the world seems set up to hamper our success. I get mad because I understand so little of it, why we do the things we do to ourselves. I get mad because I want it all to change. For me. For you. For everyone.

And you know what? I don’t think there’s anything wrong with getting a little angry about this stuff. I’m glad I make you laugh from time to time. I’m happy I inspire some of you every so often. For some people, laughs and a little lofty talk may be enough.

If you’re like me though, you may have to get truly good and angry to get this ball really rolling. Anyone who’s ever split their pants in public knows the power of harnessing that blood-boiling anger to get going in the right direction. Getting good and angry gives you an edge, a power that is sometimes hard to deny.

I’m not so mad today though. I guess I’ve got the scale to thank for that.

42 comments:

  1. I would say that I would have been mad at the same situation. I don't want to see people harming themselves either. With food, or anything else for that matter. When I see situations like that, I end up seeing my old self in those people, and how I harmed myself with food for so long. And I want to change it. I want to "show them the way" so to speak.

    Also, I think it's only human to assume. And you're right, there is absolutely nothing wrong with getting mad about the situation and feeling some sense of injustice for the daughter.

    Sometimes, the truth is hard to hear. That doesn't mean it shouldn't be spoken. Kudos for the post yesterday, and congrats on the loss! Keep on keeping on!

    Hope

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  2. I'm glad you like the "Tea Time With the Queen" Award

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  3. Yay, so glad you lost weight after all - just goes to show that the habits are ingrained enough to withstand a short spell away from your normal routine.

    And, I read quite a lot else in the last post and wasn't offended at all - all posts have value, getting your feelings out in blogland is better than comfort-eating in front of the fridge!

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  4. So much for the conspiracy theory that you really are a modest, little librarian, in a small Midwestern town!

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  5. "I get mad because I want it all to change. For me. For you. For everyone."

    I SO hear this.

    Congrats on the loss!

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  6. Congrats on that loss. I need some of your post-vacay magic to rub off on me.

    As for your post yesterday, look, it's a complex emotional issue...especially when we've been where they are. Because obesity is often more an illness brought about by lifestyle choices than of something out of someone's control (like prostate cancer), there is an element of judgment involved, since we're essentially inserting ourselves into their situation.

    It's tough.

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  7. You shouldn't have to defend your rant, if people didn't like what you had to say they didn't have to read what you wrote...that is life you wrote what you were feeling and it is what it is. Congrats on the loss by the way! :)

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  8. i was quite amazed at the outburst of emotion yesterday, while at the same time understanding it. thanks for taking the time today to delve deeper. It took me finally getting really mad, in order to effect change in my life.

    Your post yesterday, brought back a memory from when I was a child (and quite thin) My dad came back from Florida, and told us of a trip to a buffet, where there was a 500ish lb woman that waddled up several times with platesful. When she sat, she had to spread her legs apart, to make room for her stomache - her legs couldn't sit together. He had never seen such a thing in his life - it really saddened him. that was in the late seventies.

    Our nation(s) have been getting more and more obese. We should be outraged, SERIOUSLY worried.. and thank GOD, most of us here are doing what we can in our own lives and families to make a change for the better.

    A year ago I was at a buffet, and as i sat down, i realized my legs weren't together - and i had to really really struggle to get behind the table of my booth. I remembered my dad's awe from 30 yrs ago, and I suddenly realized that *I* was that woman. I nearly cried... and suddenly realized, that yes... I was a spectacle. It took me a few more months to get really mad, and say ENOUGH.

    Jack - I appreciated your post yesterday - because it was raw truth. There was pain and longing. We could all say "i hope nobody ever looks at me like that, or writes about me like that" but seriously, who are we kidding?? We're human, we're fallible. Which of us has NOT looked at something foreign to us, and talked about it? Whether it be a tattoo'd face,piercings up the wazoo, a skinny freak or a fat slob like me, someone who's wearing too little, or too much.

    sorry.. i likely said way too much.

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  9. I think we need to start getting mad at this stuff more often! We live in a toxic society and we accept it like docile sheep. Things will never change unless we start getting passionate!

    Well done on the loss!

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  10. I do agree that sometimes getting mad is a good thing and sometimes it helps push us through tough times. I think yesterday's post was wrote from the heart and that's what blogging is about, getting things out and talking about them. We don't always have to agree with each other either. I've taken plenty away from your posts Jack and to me that's what important, me giving thought to things. It's about changing for the better and that does take a LOT of thought *smile*.

    Way to go on the lose!

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  11. I thought yesterday's post was very realistic...it could have been applied to me, only not with the food choices and my kid is skinny.

    I think as we go along on the journey, we see things in a different light. And when we see, we see ourselves...so I could have written that post and it would have not been about another couple, it would have been about me. Go figure.

    I think as we go along on this journey, all different kinds of emotions surface. The whole point is to actually feel them--that is living. Life is not perfect, neither are our emotions. We get smarter as we go.

    Congrats on your loss!

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  12. Hey, Jack: I'm just getting caught up on blogs after being crazed last week at the fair so I'll have to go back and read the post that kicked off such drama! :) In the meantime, wanted to say congrats on the weight loss this week. Awesome!

    ~Wendy

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  13. Congrats on your loss Jack and my opinion is your blog - your rules- end of story.

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  14. Wow, you eeked out a loss this week, that's awesome. Just goes to show you can have fun as long as you "pay the piper" afterwards.
    I got your post yesterday. As a mom of two girls, I am extremely afraid of pushing my bad habits on them, and causing them to have weight issues.
    When I read your post, I just felt sad for that family. Sad for the parents, who probably just don't care anymore, and probably don't realize just how much their influence affects their kids. I felt sad for the little girl, because eventually her good instincts will be crowded out by her family's bad habits.

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  15. Congrats on your loss, Mr. Sh*t!

    As for your post yesterday, I say rant away. Blogging is all about being able to express yourself. I personally found your post to be great. Its nice to see a different side to your blog.

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  16. WTF?! You have a loss right after vacay? Inhuman! Eh, congrats I guess. hehehe

    Glad you're 'not so mad' today.

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  17. To be honest, I get mad at the people that don't get mad, or think you are wrong with getting mad. So, if these people who think you are wrong in feeling and saying what you posted yesterday saw these people shooting up heroin, snorting cocaine, or even smoking pot with their children, let alone harassing the child who didn't want to partake in their destructive behavior, would they get mad? Sure they would. Of course obesity isn't illegal so maybe the drugs is a far stretch of comparison but you get my point. What if these parents were alcoholics - subjecting their children to excessive drinking - making them think that drinking as a way to make you feel better is okay? Wouldn't that make all of us angry to see that? Over eating is right up there with alcoholism and smoking. It is doing something that you "think" makes you feel better but in reality it is killing you and is only a very temporary fix. I could go on and on about this because it makes me angry too, but I will spare you.

    Keep up the great work Jack! I look forward to reading your blog every day!

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  19. Congrats on the loss!!

    Abuse is abuse, how would people expect you to react to seeing someone yell at their child or perhaps smack them across the face? We are doing a BIG disservice to our young folk to not teach them better - and in my feeble mind its right up there with abuse! And goodness knows I've been guilty!

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  20. Congrats on the loss!

    And there's nothing wrong with getting mad.

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  21. Congrats on the loss! I just got back from a mini vacay, and I can't say that my scale loved me as much!!! It's kinda good to get back to "reality"!!

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  22. Congrats on your vacation loss--that's great news!

    And thanks to you, today I'm going to be singing the "Ain't baaa-aaad to get maaa-aad" a la the cartoon goat who sang it on Sesame Street. Seriously, I don't know where my car keys are, but I remember all the words to a song I saw once or twice 30 years ago.

    For the record, I think anger can be a good thing. Channeled, it can be a powerful force for change, and even when it's just a cathartic scatter bomb it's still got it's uses. I suspect that from my comment yesterday that you think that I disagree with the assertions and observations you made in your open letter to that couple, but the truth is that I agree wholeheartedly with nearly everything you said. I've written similar diatribes about the things I've seen myself, said them out loud to people who would listen. But I've also found that, for me, that whole shtick about pride going before the fall is more true than I'd like it to be. I can't count the times I've found myself on my soapbox about the evils of obesity and wondering just why the rest of the world can't get their act together like I did, only to be knocked right off of it. Sometimes I have to fight to remind myself that what I find the most distasteful in others is very often what I can't bear to look at in the mirror--and the minute that I start to think I've got it all figured out is usually the same moment when I forget just how quickly I could be right back where I started.

    I guess that the truth is that I'd have thought every single thing you did about the couple you saw, but I'd also have seen myself in their faces and with every lift of their fork. I know just how easily I could be them again--and how I probably AM them to watchful eyes, no matter how much progress I've made. That makes me mad for all of us.

    I'm glad you wrote that, and I'm equally glad you posted it. Talking about the fat is often just as hard as shedding it.

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  23. lets see, we have nine and ten y/o kids getting type II diabetes in the u.s.now.

    they no longer call this disease adult onset anymore, since children get it now.

    people should be angry, and in a positive way , like you do, with answers peppered in, a good example to display, a new path people can follow.

    superiority? yes, i am superior to the person i was 30lbs ago. i have more energy, more love to give, more to offer the world i live in.

    i think the distinction is in getting superior habits, not feeling superior to other people.

    most people who recover from addictions develope a healthy sense of disdain for their former self destruction. and they healthfully embrace that disdain. its very self protective. and it can even lead others to life saving changes.

    being quiet and acting like nothings wrong won't solve the problem. im glad you wrote the post jack. it was respectful, but pointed.

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  24. Yay Jack! Congrats on coming out with a loss afterall. And there's nothing wrong with getting mad. I get mad all the time when I see people treating their bodies terribly. And I don't just mean overeating. I'm a big anti-smoker. It's terrible. All of it. But then, I've never understood self-destructive behavior. It just angers me.

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  25. Congrats on the loss, Jack.

    And I say keep posting what you feel. It doesn't have to be comfortable for you or anyone else. Just needs to be you.

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  26. Congrats on your loss!!!! Hey, debate is good BUT I do think we all can agree that children learn A LOT in the house they are brought up in & the parents need to take responsibility for that & their children's health. I know this hits people bad when you talk like that BUT a wake up call is needed! I applaud you for it & I have done the same. It ain't easy but.... our health & the children's health are at stake!

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  27. That's a great loss, especially coming off of a vacation.

    One of the best things about blogging is the cathartic nature of it. That and the free exchange of ideas. Thank you for sharing your anger and for allowing others (including me) to let you know our thoughts on it.

    Sounds like you're off to a fabulous day!

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  28. Congrats on the loss!! Probably because you didn't take the Annheuser Busch tour while in St. Louis. Or is it now the Stella tour?

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  29. Jack, you're awesome! First off congrats on your weight-loss for the week (heck, congrats on the weight-loss since you started!) but mostly congrats for you last post. I reread it today and see nothing wrong with it. It's not like you took a picture of these people and posted it on the web with big flashy warning signs that said "bad parents ahead!"... you just reaccounted what you saw and felt... and isn't that what our blogs are for?

    Keep up the awesome posts! They get me through my bad days of this weight-loss journey!

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  30. Rant if you want to! rave if you want to! it felt more like a "wake-up-and-smell-the-coffee" to me!

    congrats on the vacay weight loss!

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  31. 2.6 is not bad at all. Arent' you glad you weighed in?

    And I understand getting angry. I get angry at myself all the time with what I've taught my children about eating habits. I just hope no one ever looks at my teenage son or daughter and thinks there is no hope for them. I'm trying to undo what I've done now, and it will take everything I've got. I just hope it's not "too late" for us.

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  32. I don't see anything wrong with your post yesterday at all. Your blog = your opinion. I understand your thinking and getting angry (I usually get more disgusted more than anything). It would've been different if you did say something, but you didn't so I say it's all good.

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  33. I said it yesterday, in a post and in an email, and I'll say it again today.

    Yesterday's post was AWESOME...absolutely NOTHING wrong with it...and I'm glad that although you told us that you wrote it out of anger, at the same time you did not apologize for writing it. I love that integrity in your blog. I love the way you're keeping it real. So many people are scared to express how they REALLY feel for fear of offending someone else....I know I've been that way before. I'm glad you're not. Keep being YOU Jack...and I'll keep reading on a daily basis. :)

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  34. Glad to see you had a loss. That will go a long way to making one feel better. Don't apologize for yesterday's post. You made a good point. And apparently touched some raw nerves. Could it be that they saw themselves in your post?

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  35. Nice vacation loss.

    I am glad to see you talking about shit that bothers you, whether I like the content or not. I related to your feelings because I am in touch with how I treat/judge/analyze people in my thoughts.

    By the way. The secret IS making your arms so sore that you cannot lift even a fork without crying. No forks, no spoons, no pints of ice cream, no burgers- if I want it I am going to have to cry through it. AHHAA! I am glad you pointed that out.

    Next we are going to have to find a way to make people too sore to sit in front of the TV/computer, and are only comfortable walking around (activity)!!

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  36. I think this is your blog and you should write whatever you want on it. I mean, it is your blog, happiness, anger, funny!!! When you justify, you second guess. There is a reason you are popular.

    By the way, I am glad you are closer to the pickles.

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  37. There is no right or wrong when it comes to venting, you just have to get it out sometimes. I can see how you might be p*ssed. I get that way in walmart when I hear parents speaking to their children as if they hate them. It drives me nuts. Good job on holding it together and getting a loss, not for us but for you.
    chris

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  38. Great job on the loss. I know what you mean about being mad. After I found out my Grandma died yesterday, I was soo mad, mad at the world, mad about everything in my life, mad that I sit here and think my life sucks and I do nothing about it sometimes. So I got out and ran hard for 26:48 minutes.

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  39. The post in question was my introduction to your blog, and while I can see how you could, quite rightly be criticized, I am not about to. I have had the exact same thoughts and feelings. In soon to be in laws, while not big, are the type who try to "win" at buffet, as though if you can do anything but waddle painfully away from the table the restaurant has gotten the better of you. Even before trying to loose weight I hated this attitude, and I hate it more when it limits others, especially children.

    But yeah, whatever mine or anyone else's stance is on the topic, yay for your drop, and just stopping by to tell you that reading your blog (and others) has inspired me to start keeping my own! Feel free to drop by!

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  40. Jack, you're spot on. Don't apologize for anything. And as for the 2.6 lbs. I take that. I'm feeling plateau-ish again. Dammit!

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  41. I didnt comment on yesterday's post but I think that anytime we are basically declaring war on something (even if that something is our own gluttony, ignorance or just plain weakness to fight the battle of the bulge periodically)we NEED to feel anger. Not constantly, but here and there it gives us the fuel to validate whats very tough for us to do, to keep doing it and push through even if we havent had the best day or week. We need to keep the big picture in our minds---to be healthier! Its tough not to judge others depending on where we are in our personal battles, but its part of human nature. You did not get in the parents' faces and condemn them, you just wrote an insightful and powerful blog---natch!

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  42. OH and congrats on pulling out that loss!!

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