Saturday, June 27, 2009

Interview with Jack Sh*t's Wife, Anita


JS: What’s it like being married to the “bad boy of weight loss blogging”?
Anita: See, that’s just ridiculous. You are not the “bad boy of weight loss blogging.” I swear…

JS: Okay, let me rephrase the question: what’s it like being married to the “original outlaw of weight loss…”
Anita: Okay, I’m outta here.

JS: Wait, wait. What’s a typical day for Anita Sh*t?
Anita: Well, at breakfast I generally have to sit through a food lecture from a man who used to eat Cocoa Puffs every morning.

JS: Cocoa Puffs are very high in Niacin
Anita: You don’t even know what Niacin is.

JS: Yes, I do. It’s something that's in Cocoa Puffs. Anyway, tell me more about your typical day.
Anita: Why are you asking me these questions?

JS: Ummmm, it’s a surprise.
Anita: For our anniversary next week?

JS: Our anniversary’s next week? Yeeeeees, it’s for a double-secret anniversary project I’m working on. How did you meet Jack Sh*t?
Anita: Why are you referring to yourself in the third person? Bob Dole used to do that all the time; it’s very annoying.

JS: How did you meet… your husband?
Anita: We went to high school together.

JS: Love at first sight?
Anita: Hardly.

JS: Love at second sight?
Anita: You’re getting warmer.

JS: How has Jack… how has I changed as he’s been on this weight loss journey.
Anita: Well, he seems to spend an awful lot of time on the computer.

JS: Writing?
Anita: Giggling.

JS: Maybe he’s in a good mood?
Anita: Maybe he needs his meds checked. Look, I’ve got a lot of work to do. You can do your play interview with Pisa.

JS: Grrrrr… okay, Pisa. How was your dad changed over the past few months?
Pisa: He’s still fat but he’s not as fat as he was when he was really fat.

JS: Pisa, what’s it like being the daughter of the “old-school gangsta of the weight loss blogging community”?
Pisa: Moooom, Dad’s being weird.

24 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. Niacin is good for you, right?

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  3. OH oh oh!! Am I maybe responsible for this interview? ;-) If not, I'll just walk away embarrassed now. But anyway, this interview was so funny, I read it aloud to my husband, of course I used slang for the word Sh*t because my children were in the room (and Lord knows they have never heard that word before Ahem!).
    I do hope that Anita will agree to more interviews because it sounds like she is your comedic yet sarcastic twin. She is the chocolate to your milk, the vanilla ice cream to your peach pie...Ok, I need to go to the bakery now.

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  4. Serial killers usually refer to themselves in the third person...

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  5. Y'all are just plain weird. I'm happy I found your blog! :)

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  6. Dina - he DID talk about Cocoa Puffs - CEREAL killer?

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  7. Dina used to follow my old blog: "Killing Time with Jack Sh*t".

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  8. Cocoa Puffs has niacin? Righteous.

    LOL Great interview.

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  9. Move over Ryan Seacrest! Jack Sh*t is in da house!

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  10. Great interview! I'm loving the laughs!

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  11. H-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S.

    *basks in your comical genius*

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  12. That was fantastic! Very funny! I didn't know you were high school sweet hearts! Us too! I imagine we have way more in common than just a sick and funny sense of humor and the desire to lose weight!
    We should get together sometime and eat Cocoa Puffs or something.
    I think I love you. In a "must read" kind of way, not in any other inapropiate way. But it does look kind of stalkerish what I've written...I could erase it before posting, but that wouldn't be any fun!
    20 years here, you?

    Take care and keep being you---Cause you are an amazingly talented individual who I believe has discovered a gift that has the potential to become a career. You're that good Mr. Sh*t.

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  13. Sean, we'll have been married 40 years in the year 2026.

    And please don't make me enforce that restraining order. 100 yards at all times!

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  14. Now i know where you get your sense of humour :)

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  15. Your kid's name is Pisa Sh*t??

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  16. anita and pisa - classic.

    more more!!

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  17. The kids make fun of her at school.

    I think it's because she wears glasses.

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  18. This is classic... mind of I copy this idea sometime? Maybe...

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  19. The truth is out...Jack Sh*t giggles!!!!!

    Loved the interview!

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  20. I'm trying to catch up. Sorry I missed your half-ass half pound challenge. If only I had lost a half pound this week lol.

    This was very funny, I think this is how the conversation with my husband would go lol.

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