Monday, January 17, 2011

Bodfather: Here Comes the Judging

Subject #2 in the "Bodfather" 

Witness Reduction Program: Laurie

Height: 5'6"
Starting weight: 240  
Current weight: 228 

Total Loss: 12 lbs.

They call me the Bodfather. There are many things my father Horace taught me here in this room. He taught me: keep your friends close, keep your enemies closer and keep your friends who you're trying to help with their weight-loss journey even closerer.

Hey Jack,

After a week of crappy eating, with bright moments of health, and struggling to get any activity in with a bum knee, I am feeling much better. Oh, I expect a gain this week. But I got way more out of this week than just a pound or two, I got knowledge. I got schooled in all the ways my plans will not work and what I have to do to make this weight loss thing doable for my schedule.  

I was completely unprepared for the amount of food that would be around the office. I have never worked in an office situation before. I spent years working in labs where the holidays were acknowledged, but no luncheons, no candy, no crap around the offices.  Over the last 2 weeks, we have had multiple clients and people in the community drop cakes, pies, candy, and other assorted fat making dishes.  It culminated in yesterday. 

Yesterday, I almost cried at my desk. I walk in and on my desk are two big boxes of Godiva chocolates and three gift bags full of homemade goodies (fudge, peanut brittle, pralines, fruit cake cookies, etc). I thanked everyone, had a few things because it was so overwhelming, packed everything up and took it home (I probably should have just thrown it all in a dumpster). My husband (home for the weekend) and I just stared at it all. And then I packed it up again and there it sits, like an evil demon on the counter waiting to suck me into its depths. All of it is going somewhere other than my house. I don't care where, just out. Having it there broke me for a bit. I spent too much time agonizing over whether I could actually lose weight. My emotional interactions with food has really surprised me.

So now, my skin is looking somewhat sallow (I haven't gotten much sleep in the last 4 days because we have a horrible deadline that is killing us, but Thursday of next week, it will be over) from too much sugar and fat.

And I realize that people around me are going to make the whole thing harder and I have to be better prepared for that.  People in this office know I am losing weight and watching what I eat.  And still yesterday happened.  I feel like yelling at them, but I can't because I know in their minds they are being kind.  And I am going to have many sessions where sleep is a luxury I can't afford to indulge in too much.  And eating at the office during between and around meetings and deadlines is going to have to be planned for in much more detail.

Progress can be measured in other than pounds.  Progress can be made in learning what works and what doesn't and implementing accordingly.

  1. Planning is key to getting through any situation.  But planning must be backed up with the resources available.  For instance, keeping food in the freezer for emergencies is fine as long as the food doesn't suck.  Keep with only tried and true stuff.
  2. People are kind hearted evil things.  Take the goodies, walk to the dumpster and toss. 
  3. Activity is a bitch to get in when chained to a desk.  I will have to plan around it and stick to the plan. Walking for more than 5-10 minutes during the day is unrealistic.  But a 5 minute walk multiple times a day isn't.

So Jack, you can yell at me for being weak around the food, I deserve it. But it was an amazing learning experience. And this year, instead of greeting the New Year hating myself for being fat, etc., I greet the New Year with an open heart, having learned that EVERY situation teaches me how to do this whole weight loss thing better, if I pay attention. That's a very powerful feeling.

Oh, and beginning Saturday, I start a detox. I gotta get the sugar out of my system. Veggies, fruits, whole grains, lean meats. No sugar!!!

Hope you are having a wonderful holidays and hope everyone is healthy.


Hey Laurie,

Well Laurie, I'd like to yell at you but it seems like your own body is beating you up enough. I've lived through (and continue to live through) the break room full of goodies and the sugary presents from well-meaning nitwits. It's easy enough to get through it provided that you don't try to half-ass it... this is truly a situation where you can't have your cake and eat it too.

If you truly are on board going forward, then I'd say it's a one step backward, two steps forward kind of deal. And truthfully Laurie, you're either going to do this now or you're just not. I'd like to think that I can push and cajole folks to be passionate about this business, but at the end of the day it's all on you. You can decide that this is going to be a top priority for you or you can shrug it off and things will simply stay the same.

I hope you'll use the knowledge you've gained as a launching pad to something extraordinary, but I guess we'll just have to wait and see...

Hope you and your family have a nice holiday.


Obligatory lawyer joke:

A local United Way office realized that the organization had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute. 

“Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $700,000, you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the community in some way?”

The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and replied, “First, did your research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness, and has medical bills that are several times her annual income?” 

Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbled, “Um ... no.”

The lawyer interrupts, “or that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?”

The stricken United Way rep began to stammer out an apology, but was interrupted again. 

“Or that my sister's husband died in a traffic accident,” the lawyer's voice rising in indignation, “leaving her penniless with three children?!”

The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, said simply, “I had no idea...” 

On a roll, the lawyer cut him off once again, “So if I don't give any money to them, why should I give any to you?”

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  1. Hang in there. Sooooo proud of you. You are an inspiration!

  2. Ok, after a few moments of laughter (I don't giggle) at the lawyer joke, I realized something stuck in my head. It were these words from the Bodfather, "you're either going to do this now or you're just not"... it is a choice, not a fate that you'll do one or the other. You get to choose Laurie. You too Jack. And me. And I think everyone but Green Bay packer fans get to make this choice; they are just doomed but thats a different post.

    Choose the YOU you WANT!

  3. Laurie, you have to be really firm with the folks in the office. Tell them that you can't eat one thing that they offer because you are on a special diet. You tell them often enough and they eventually quit with the food assault.

    Everyone knows I won't vary - not a smidge of cake here or a cookie there. We go out to eat and I order the lightest thing on the menu every time. They don't even offer crap to me anymore because they know the response. Drill it into them!

    And Jack is right, this is a choice you have to make if you want to lose the weight no matter what stress or obstacles are in your way. There is always a choice.

  4. Patrick said it very nicely... CHOOSE THE YOU YOU WANT!!!

    I answered a FB post this morning at about 5am before I went to the gym. It asked if there was a point at which you said "enough is enough"- I am going to lose weigh. Well, not really, but there was a feeling that I had. It was one of "no regrets". I did not want to look back and say-- "Gee, I wish I had done that".

    So, I made a choice. The great thing is that we all get to make one!!

  5. Obligatory Lawyer jokes keep me happy. Thanks Jack.

  6. Thanks everyone. The time frame of that email was a really awful time. I just had no defenses going into it and allowed myself to get bombarded.

    @Kimberly, you are completely dead on. I can't let this continue, it gets too hard to toss that stuff out.

    @Patrick and Rob - you guys are on the money. Right now I am choosing to exercise and eat right and it feels awfully good.

  7. Gotta love the obligatory lawyer joke Jack - nicely played :)

  8. Nice lawyer joke Jack!! Hang in there Laurie!!!!



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