Sunday, July 24, 2011
Breaking In a New Scale
Total loss: -66.9
Emotion: Three-quarters awesome
Jack: I know this is your first day on the job, but there’s a few things we need to get straight before you start…
Scale: Hop on.
Jack: You see, I think we should begin these weigh-in proceedings with some witty banner. Maybe a joke, maybe a funny anecdote…
Scale: I said “Hop on, bitch!”
Jack: I don’t understand why every scale I come in contact with has to have such a piss-poor attitude.
Scale: What part of “Hop on, bitch!” do you not understand?
Jack: I'm just saying that I think there's room for some civility in our relationship...
Scale: Do you think I enjoy sitting here, staring at your junk all day? Hop on!
Jack: You know, a few words of encouragement might make all the difference in this situation.
Scale: I’m going back to sleep now.
Jack: No, no… let’s do this thang!
Jack: You couldn’t have given me a tenth of pound so I could have lost an whole pound this week?