Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Linkmericks

Michelle at Eating Journey asked me to weigh in on the one-year anniversary of her tremendous "Exposed" movement, so I sent her this little ditty:



There once was a girl named Michelle,
A fascinating young mademoiselle.
She did an “Exposed,”
Without many clothes,
And bid body image issues farewell.

Then it dawned on me: have I really gone a year-and-a-half in this space and not force-fed you some ridiculous limericks?

That all changes today. I enjoy making stuff rhyme and I like promoting other people's fantastic blogs, so every so often I plan on providing more "Linkmericks".


Meet Live Smile Run’s beauty, Syl.
If you need someone to inspire, she will.
Decked out all in pink,
We’ve watched this chick shrink.
Her story’s anything but run-of-the-mill.

There once was a lady called Bitch Cakes,
Who was all retro dresses and kitsch takes.
Now she’s less “broad” of a broad.
Check her out, you’ll be awed,
Cuz few make a better blog than this bitch makes.

Who doesn’t love Healthy Loser Gal?
She helps us all maintain good morale.
When motivation’s required,
You’ll find yourself inspired.
She’s our healthy, weight-losing pal.

There was an Anonymous Fat Girl named Bobbie,
Who was trying to live life less blobby.
Now she’s exercising,
And her blog’s energizing,
And now fitness is more than a hobby.

There’s TJ from TJ’s Test Kitchen.
Whose food shots are often bewitchin’.
She’s the queen of the pool,
Our weight-losin’ jewel
(but Pisa says “Don’t eat so much chicken!”).

Then there’s Escape from Obesity’s Lyn,
Who has found the strong person within.
She may not show her face,
But she shows grit and grace.
That’s why I return again and again.

How about Truth2BeingFit’s Jody?
She’s anything but an old fogey.
By controlling actions and hunger,
She looks fifteen years younger.
Be like her and live life more boldly.

And then there’s Carb Tripper’s Anne,
Who has reworked her grand master plan.
Bad habits have been dumped,
And now this lady’s jumped
From the fire and the frying pan.

There was a lass named Gen who got banded.
Due to the fact that her waistline expanded.
But she had too much to drink,
Got her feet out of sync,
Now she’s typing her blog out one-handed.

Have you met Tony, the ol’ Anti-Jared?
A blogging and working out zealot.
He’s got plenty to say,
He’s lost more than you weigh.
Favorite vegetable... broccoli or carrot?





x

18 comments:

  1. Thanks, Jack!

    You made my day!

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  2. well wasn't that a lovely surprise Jack ;-). I know you want to join us in the pink dress run....come on I dare you ;-).

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  3. Ha! This is awesome, and thanks for immortalizing me in limerick! I am forever grateful :)

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  4. Umm, Jack... you have 1,666 followers. I know that is not just a plain "666" but it is still probably a little bit unlucky.

    Hey, also, I am on MyFitnessPal, and one of the members wrote a great re-do of The Raven - it totally made me think of you - you should read it! Here's the link:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/OnionCookie/view/the-weigh-en-43717

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  5. There once was a blogger named Jack
    who I think has quite a nice rack.
    His W.I.D.T.H. posts inspire,
    His food no longer comes straight from the fryer,
    And his humor, of sh*t does not lack.

    (It makes more sense if you read it after a few beers. Or 7)

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  6. Nice limericks. I would have sent you one back but I see that's already been done and I besides, I haven't had my 7 beers yet today.

    But I will say this: Your bananas bewilder me.....just a little bit.

    October 13, 2010 11:37

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  7. Wait, how did I get kicked out of The League of Extraordinarily Fat Gentlemen? And why are there no guys in it anymore?

    Jesus, you turn off your comments for a month, and you lose track!

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  8. You can NEVER go wrong with a well rhymed and timed Limerick... but are there no weight loss bloggers from Nantucket? I bet you can find one! lol

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  9. Honored!!! :) Thank you for the smiles, Mr. Sh*t! xo Jan

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  10. Aren't their amazing people in this blog world!!! I am so glad I found all of these wonderful people!

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  11. well, this has got to be the cutest post ever :)

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  12. LOL!!!!! Back in third grade I remember our teacher giving us an assignment to come up with a word that "rhymed" with our first name. Not a whole lot rhymes with "Bobbie" so she gave me the suggestion of "Bottlecap Bobbie". Why I have no freaking idea. But I am totally gonna rock the non-blobby Bobbie. Like it. A lot. ha ha

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  13. Your creativity always surprises and delights me. I wish I was as cool as you. Thank you for your support, to be honest, you've been a HUGE guide for me through this all, and I have shared and bookmarked many of your posts.

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  14. Awesome! I used to write silly poems too but it's been YEARS!

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  15. My turn my turn my turn...I need a Big Butted limerick just for me! :) Pretty Please, oh creative one? (just don't rhyme butt with slut..LOL)

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  16. Now I'm not a fan of cheap poetry, but the bitch-cakes one is pretty well-crafted. Made me laugh. I mean, when you can rhyme "bitch-cakes" well... and not just once, but twice? I tip my hat.

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