Thursday, February 9, 2012

Even More Ways to Make Your Office More Healthy

• To make yourself take the stairs, fill the elevator shaft with packing peanuts.

• Encourage shorter sit-down meetings by putting a loaded pistol on the table in front of you and mumbling incoherently.

• Buy everything in the vending machine, empty each package and replace the contents with healthy alternatives and then figure out some way to get them back in the machine.

• If a co-worker brings in a box of donuts, say “Hey, thanks for the donuts” in such a way that they’ll feel utter shame in what they did but that others won’t think you’re a jerk.

• See about getting your job responsibilities changed to “testing out effectiveness of local personal training programs.”

• Replace hold music with Jillian Michael’s shrieking “Get up and move your ass!” over and over.

• Organize a “Biggest Gainer” contest at your office; that way, even if you’re not losing weight, you’ll still feel better about yourself!

• Replace your office chair with a unicycle.

•Talk to your supervisor about the possibility of replacing the supply closet with a state-of-the-art workout facility.


  1. bosses did that. Replaced the basement storage area with a gym. There are even showers and a locker room! Outside of being my own boss, I have the best bosses ever.

  2. Jack...please e-mail the phone number of the gal pictured...I'd like her where she got her exercise ball...thanks!



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