Friday, October 21, 2011

Things That'll Get You Kicked Out of a WW Meeting

  • Loudly challenging everyone in the room to a caramel apple-eating contest
  • Wearing a Sumo wrestling outfit to meeting
  • Bringing a more forgiving scale and offering “second opinion” weigh-ins for $5
  • Standing on your chair and singing “I Like Big Butts” at the top of your lungs
  • Picking a fight with somebody because she’s sitting in your “lucky chair”
  • Cleaning your gun during meeting
  • Screaming “I’M SO DAMN HUNGRY” every five minutes
  • Wearing pants made out of fruit leather
  • Taking bets during weigh-ins
  • Trying to organize a séance during meeting
  • Loudly repeating every single word the leader says
  • Repainting the wall because you claim the wall color is responsible for your recent weight gain
  • Wheeling in a wagon filled with steaming hot taco meat
  • Excessive public flossing
  • Spending entire meeting making elaborate candy corn sculptures
  • Dressing up like a giant Gummi Bear and prancing around the room during meeting
  • Trying to sign people up to your knock-off weight loss program “Weight Watchpersons” at a booth in the restroom
  • Trying to hook up your own hammock to sit in
  • Insisting on weighing in nude



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