Wednesday, September 15, 2010

This Isn’t Me

You woke up fat.

That’s what happened to me anyway: I woke up one day, wiped the sleepy out of my eyes and gazed in the mirror.

I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.

This isn’t me.

The “me” in my mind’s eye was fit and spirited, healthy and vital.

The “me” staring back at me was pasty, weak and lifeless, sporting a layered look even though he had yet to get dressed.

This isn’t me.

Somehow, we convince ourselves that we’re doing okay, even when presented with an abundance of evidence to the contrary.

We understand that our actions have consequences, but the truth of those words slip tantalizingly through our fingertips.

We know what we need to do, and yet we falter and fail and can’t for the life of us begin to understand the reasons why.

And then one day, it dawns on us…

This isn’t me.

I’m not a person that knows better but can’t do better.

I’m not a person that’s too frightened, worried or weak to make a positive change in my life.

I’m not a person that just doesn’t give a damn.

This isn’t me.

I can do this.

I can grab the reins of my life and take control of what I eat and how I live.

I can push myself harder and further than I ever thought possible.

I can scale a mountain by taking one uphill step at a time.

The other day, someone needed a photo of me for something or other and asked if they could use the one they had on file. I asked for them to email it to me…



No, I replied.

That isn’t me.


This is me.



Note: Hadn't had enough sh*t today?
Head over to Did I Just Eat That Out Loud
for my birthday guest post for Mrs. Fatass.


38 comments:

  1. Great post! Look at the size of the smile on your face in the second photo- that says it all!

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  2. Awesome post! So inspiring!
    no, the old me wasn't me. The 107lb(and counting) lighter girl typing this is ME! =)

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  3. Great post, Jack, and just look at your skinny self. :) You rock!

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  4. Everything you said rang true for me. Thank you for the reminder. You definately have given me an added incentive, I mean look at that picture (awesome job).

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  5. And a sexy sexy man you are. Thanks for this post buddy! I had one of those awakenings last July and it's time I remember that morning again.

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  6. Great post Jack!!! What a difference in all ways.

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  7. I get those moments when I catch myself getting dressed in the mirror and literally just stop. Look from all angles, and think that it "isn't me". Thanks for motivating me to look forward to my workout tonight. Nice second photo :)

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  8. Great before and after pics! I've been struggling lately and it's amazing how one day I'll feel great about myself and then another I'll be having a "fat day." My most recent one was when I was wearing a size 6 dress. I never thought I'd be able to wear a size 6 and it seems ridiculous to me now that I was having a "fat day" while wearing one that fit fine. I know I can do better than I am doing now though and it's just a matter of doing it!

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  9. Great post, Jack!

    You look so happy in the second photo!

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  10. Go Jack!

    And seriously...clear that bookcase before it topples over on your handsome self.

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  11. Damn you have one cluttered bookcase! lol Seriously tho Jack- Glad you told them no, who was that guy in that 1st pic tryin to be you anyway? lol Off to read ya on Sue's blog....

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  12. I do have a cluttered bookcase, but I have an even more cluttered brain.

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  13. I had convinced myself that my clothes were shrinking or that the sizes were changes. It never occurred to me that my ass was actually getting THAT fat. :)

    And I LOVE the active person I have become. I remember feeling helpless and lost and hopeless. I remember feeling like I had NO IDEA what to do to make a change. I couldn't imagine running more than a block, much less riding my bicycle 40 miles! It's awesome to look back and note the positive progress.

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  14. Denial! We've all done it..That can't be me.. how about looking at another "fat" person and saying "at least I'm not that Big" and then seeing yourself in the window of a store and realizing..YES you are...A wake up call!
    I'm going to print this out and put it on my mirror as a reminder so I can see it everyday..especially about the part I CAN DO.
    Thanks

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  15. Just started reading your blog and I must say that this is one of the most inspiring posts I've read. I can't wait to keep reading about your life (ok that's creepy but you know what I mean :-P).

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  16. Awesomeness as usual. This one and the guest one.

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  17. Love this post. Also it looks like you could use a professional organizer. :)

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  18. Fabulous progress.
    Loved the Mrs. FA post too.

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  19. Jack, don't look behind you but someone made a huge mess out of your shelves. How many calories does organizing burn? Yeah, maybe not worth it.

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  20. Yes, Ive had to set myself down and have the talking to as well. Ive lost and gained thrice over in as many years. I could kick my own @$$ for gaining it back.. again.

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  21. WOW!!! WHOA!!! Just look at the differences in those two photos!!! Your hair is more gray! Maybe it's just the angle? ~wink~

    Your posts always make me smile! THANK YOU.

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  22. WOW Jack! Those pics tell an incredible story!

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  23. First of all you look amazing and you are just beaming in the 2nd picture so cool!
    Second I get this I totally get this! I feel like you were spying on me sunday morning because this is exactly how I felt.
    Thank you!

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  24. The differences are drastic, wow. Your body looks much healthier in the second, but I have to say your face looks far healthier in the first. That could be the lighting in the room, though.

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  25. oh i liked this very much. very much.

    i woke up fat too... damn must do something about that.

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  26. Great post! What you described happened to me, and that was my Day One. Looking at myself in the mirror and knowing that I could do better. Feeling disappointed with myself...thats what it took for me to change my habits.

    Thanks for the post!

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  27. WOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!! Great hard work & it paid off!!!!

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