Friday, December 18, 2009

Just a Few More Fitness Center Conversation Starters

  • “Do you know where they sell a good men’s sports bra?”
  • “I’m trying to get in shape for fishin’ season.”
  • “Did you know that BMI doesn’t stand for ‘Bowel Movement Indicator?’”
  • “You may be able to bench press your weight, but I can eat my weight in Milk Duds.”
  • “It’s a workout Snuggie, dumbass.”
  • “Can you do me a favor? Watch me to a lat pull and tell me if you think it’s pretty.”
  • “I just downloaded an app that tracks how many sit-ups I should have done.”
  • “Do you know anyone who would trade personal training sessions for yodeling lessons?”
  • “My old gym wasn’t this shiny.”
  • “I think of this place as my Sweet Sweat Palace!”
  • “Would you like to hear me recite a haiku?”
  • “Did you know babies are born without kneecaps? It’s true!”
  • “High-five! I did a push-up!”
  • “Before I get started, do you happen to know CPR?”
  • “I’m feeling extra exercisey today!”
  • “You know what they say: ‘No pain, no assimilation of nutrients in order to facilitate muscle weight gain.’”
  • “I dare you to try to bench press 1,000 pounds.”
  • “My Jersey Shore nickname is ‘DJ Douchebag’.”
  • “I took my aunt to the prom. Oh, I’m sorry… I thought you said ‘What’s your most embarrassing secret?’ not ‘Are you almost done on the elliptical?’”


  1. "Would you like to hear me recite a haiku?"
    hahaha! you're tooooo much

  2. BMI...bowel movement indicator.......LMAO. I love the gym conversations starters. Needed to start out with a good laugh this morning. Thanks!..

  3. Too funny! Thanks for starting my day off with a laugh!

  4. Stealing this one...“My Jersey Shore nickname is ‘DJ Douchebag’.”

  5. Those are some funny things, Jack!

  6. LOL @ “I’m trying to get in shape for fishin’ season.”

  7. “Before I get started, do you happen to know CPR?”

    LMAO because I get really, really red in the face when I workout...the bane of being really fair skinned I guess...and I've had people come up & ask me if I'm okay after exercising. I'm waiting for someone to offer to call 911 or try to do CPR...

    Have a great weekend!

  8. My husband says the male sports bra one hits a little too close to home.

  9. Hi Jack. Men's sports bra - classic!

    Bearfriend xx

  10. How many sit ups I should have done and my old gym wasn't so shiny are my personal favourites. I may use them soon.

  11. It should't be a male sport would be a bro, or a manzier...:-P

  12. My fav. is “High-five! I did a push-up!”

    When I am able to actually do a "real" push-up, someone better be near me for a high-five!



  13. You had me at "men's sports bra".

  14. lol You forgot "Have I told you about my cats?"

  15. You've been on that elliptical for a while...planning on setting up housekeeping or what???
    also known as intimidating people off MY elliptical lol.

  16. funny thing is
    “My old gym wasn’t this shiny.”
    “I’m feeling extra exercisey today!”

    are things I've actually said in the gym....

    no word of a lie.
    are you stalking me perhaps?!

  17. “Do you know where they sell a good men’s sports bra?”

    Jack, I just had this conversation with someone!!! :-) YIKES!!!!!!!!!!!!

    How about the ladies that want to know if there mascara & make-up are still on cause they are doing 2 MPH on the treadmill.....

    Lots of fun to read but I bet some are true like my men's sports bra experience!

  18. LMAO too funny! the CPR one killed me! My heartrate gets up to the 170's sometimes when I'm holding on to the treadmill bars and I sometimes see the folks next to me looking at me like 'damn she about to drop?'

  19. “Do you know where they sell a good men’s sports bra?”

    This one had me in stitches! Especially because I know some men who could use one!

  20. lol I could eat my weight in Cheesecake! But really I could at least put away a good sized piece!

  21. I would totally take yodeling lessons.

  22. Hi, I have an award for you on my blog.

    There are no paticular rules to passing it on other than the person has to have inspired you in some way. Phil

  23. Haha, do you really watch Jersey Shore? It's so horribly wonderful, isn't it? I'm ashamed! Kinda..

    Getting in shape for fishing, I've actually heard that one before!

    And having a job is exercise, didn't you know? *eye roll*

  24. Excellent list(as usual) RFLMAO

  25. Oh my gosh I love your Jersey Shore comment! that show is RIDICULOUS and all my friends are addicted to its absolute insanity. It doesn't seem scripted, but I don't know how it can be real either

  26. Oh I thought you meant like the regular Jersey Shore, not some show I've never seen. That would be an appropriate name for the real thing.

    BTW if you go to Urban Outfitters they have cocktail glasses with the words "Douchebag" and "Dickweed" on them. Just last night DH and I were thinking which guests we would love to pour a drink for with those glasses.....

  27. I think I'm just gross. I liked this one: “Did you know that BMI doesn’t stand for ‘Bowel Movement Indicator?’”




Related Posts with Thumbnails