Thursday, December 17, 2009

I'm Sorry, Frosty

Jackie the Sh*t-man
Would eat whatever he could grab,
Had a big rear end and a double chin
And two sides made out of flab.

Jackie the Sh*t-man
Spent his days at the buffet.
He was made of fat,
But he said “F*ck that,”
And he came to life one day.

There must of been some magic in
That silly blog he wrote.
For when he started postin’,
Less food went down his throat.

Jackie the Sh*t-man
Was alive and feelin’ great.
And his readers know
That he’ll hit a new low
Every time he posts his weight.

Jackie the Sh*t-man
Has finally reached his goal.
And he said let’s run and have some fun
And stay under control.

Down to the weight room,
With an iPod in his hand.
Runnin’ here and there in his underwear
(Left his gym shorts in the van).

He started to hustle and built some muscle
Right to his gluteus maximus.
And to celebrate this moment,
He decided to help the rest of us.

Jackie the Sh*t-Man
Is really on his way.
Time to say goodbye, but please don't cry.
He’ll be back again Friday.

Thumpety thump thump
Thumpety thump thump
Look at Jackie go.
Thumpety thump thump
Thumpety thump thump
Over that damn plateau.

30 comments:

  1. Funny, funny, funny but always a message in it! GREAT! A pic of the gluteus maximus please to show off that muscle! :-)

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  2. Now I will be hearing this all day!

    Seriously, someone needs to perform your songs for a workout mix!!!

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  3. so catchy. frosty ain't got sh!t on jackie, obviously :)

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  4. I will never look at frosty the same way :-)

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  5. Yes, we SHOULD start a club. I'm nominating you for President!

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  6. You are a funny, funny man! Thanks for giving me a song to try and forget for the rest of the day.

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  7. I just laughed out loud and scared the other person in the room with me. Hilarious post and now I'll be singing it all day at my party! Great way to remind myself that I can stay within my limits today!

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  8. Now all I can picture in my head are brown snowmen. Eeew. Frosty the Sh*t man. Geez. Thanks a lot, Jack.

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  9. I loved it! All except the underwear part. lol

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  10. Ha! This is hilarious. T'was the first thing to make me smile this morning!

    Julia
    jewliagoulia.blogspot.com

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  11. gluteus maximus, I'd never heard that term until starting this weightloss journey, Leslie Sansone mentions it in her 4 mile walk and say she gets quite offended by that! LOL
    I'll take no offence as I'm shrinking mine anyway ;) I'm making it a gluteus minimus!

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  12. Haha. super catchy, I was singing along as i was reading. seriously,

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  13. Runnin’ here and there in his underwear
    (Left his gym shorts in the van).

    Thanks for THAT visual Jack!

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  14. Okay, this one is the best one ever! I love it I love it I love it! :-D

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  15. This is hilarious and fantastic! Good job on the weight loss and the song!

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  16. And just think - you melted away just like Frosty did!

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  17. This totally put a smile on my face! And congrats again about reaching goal!! I can't wait to get there!

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  18. That's some funny sh*t, congrats on reaching your goal

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  19. So clever! And glad you're over that plateau!

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  20. Hahahhahaaa...that is all I have. Just a lot of hahhahahahaahaaaaa! Very cute and clever.

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  21. "That he’ll hit a new low
    Every time he posts his weight."

    I love this line! So witty.

    -Denise

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  22. I didn't comment, I always comment...
    Soon I will say something original...hold on.
    um,
    wouldn't Jacky the shitman be brown?
    just sayin'
    nice song though.
    Merry Christmas!

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  23. This is so friggin' cute...you are truly a genius to come up with all these take-offs...when the heck do you sleep? Or do you lie awake at night thinking up your next masterpiece???

    lol

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  24. ROTFLMAO! How the hell do you come up with this stuff?

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  25. That is a good motivational song skit for people wanting to knock off the fat!

    Thanks, Secretia

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  26. totally hilarous that after reading this i had the song in my head...not only did my children correct me from callin Frosty the "shitman" the also asked, is Jackie like your sister Jacks?

    great post, thanks for the humour. I am reading your blogs for the first time and really commend you on dedication and determination.

    D.
    www.insatiablehost.blogspot.com

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