Thursday, March 8, 2012

What I’ve Said to the Girl Scouts…

• “Do you have any ‘Thin Mints’ that actually make you thin?”

• “I’m sorry, but Jamie Oliver says they use that pink slime to make Girl Scout cookies and I’m not supposed to buy them anymore.”

• “I’m sorry, but what part of ‘Look, I’ll cut a b*tch’ did you not understand?”

• “I’m sorry, but if I bought a box of cookies from you, I’d have to buy a box from the other 10,000 million Girl Scouts all over the world. Fair’s fair!”

• “I wish you girls would get whoever makes the Boy Scouts’ sh*tty popcorn to make your cookies. Those guys could screw up a wet dream.”

• “You can stick that box where the sun doesn’t Do-Si-Do!”

• “Sorry, but I spent my last $5 buying a box of beef jerky from the Jehovah’s Witnesses.”

• “I’d like to support you, but I just don’t eat cookies anymore; can I just write you a bad check instead?”

• “GET BACK, SATAN!”

• “I know it’s a good cause, but I need cookies like I need a box of Girl Scout cookies.”

• “Look, I’ve got three daughters; I’m not afraid to slap a little girl.”

• “No, no, no… a thousand times NO. Ummm… well, maybe just one box of Somoas…”

11 comments:

  1. I've managed to stay away this year. I had the opportunity to order but only declined because I wasn't sure the cookies would arrive before moving out of state. And luckily, I haven't been accosted in front of the grocery store (yet). But did you hear about those guys that robbed some girl scouts money? Okay, I was a little pissed that grown men would steal from children, but part of me thought, "But you didn't take any cookies???" Now that's insanity.

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  2. The last couple of years the Girl Scout stands in front of the grocery store have offered the option of buying cookies to send to the troops, and I've done that. You pay but don't get cookies - and then, of course, have to take it on faith that they get sent to the troops...although I suppose we shouldn't be sending such bad-for-you stuff to the troops either. But at least it makes me feel virtuous as I continue into the grocery store to buy chips and ice cream! :-)

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  3. Samoas? You are soooooo 2010. They're Caramel DeLites now...not exactly the same, but close...(milk chocolate instead of dark chocolate). I used to eat them by the box...and now I want a box.

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  4. The Girl Scouts were set up outside of the YMCA! So I was accosted after I finished my workout. Not cool! I pat myself on the back because I only bought three boxes.

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  5. lol! We just got done selling and we got them up front this year...so when people said "well, when do you get them?" We got to say "Right now!" lol. And yes, they do go to the troops...you enter the pledges into the database and they ship them from california over to Iraq...the troops hose them like you wouldn't believe. The money goes to the trip for fun activities and it also supporst low income girls who otherwise couldn't afford girl scouts by subsidizing troops in low income areas. Also you can do hometown heroes. This year we picked military counselors. Or you can simply give a donation to the troop if you don't want any cookies. For each box of cookies the girls get approximately half the cost of the box...so a two dollar tip costs you less AND has a bigger impact on the troop budget. and so ends this infomercial on the girl scouts. lol.

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  6. Thin mints. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA That's awesome

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  7. I got 1 box of thin mints and 1 box of samoas... and they were both delicious. But, those were the only boxes I am allowed to buy until next year. Yummm.

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  8. LOVE! LOL! Thanks for the laugh~what a way to work through the Thin Mint craving~HA HA HA! :)

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  9. I make it easily into the supermarket this time of year by wearing horserace blinders and ear plugs.

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  10. I don't bother. They aren't made with real Girl Scouts. . .

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  11. It's a good thing my adorable little niece lives 3000 miles away or we'd be set for Girl Scout cookies for life,

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