• Looking for a mood improver? Try a small piece of dark chocolate with a Zoloft tablet inside.
• The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is right now (wait... I feel like 2nd best time should be 19 years ago).
• Health tip: You can make your own healthy Omega-3 fish oil by oiling a fish and then adding some Omega-3 to it.
• Household hint: Got some old mushy bananas? Try going to the store and getting some new fresh bananas.
• It was kinda awkward when the homeless guy pulled me outta the way of upcoming bus, then it turned out I didn't have any spare change.
• Live each day as though it's your last; mine's been filled with updating my will and leaving weepy messages on friend's voicemails...
• If I had to be marooned on a desert island with just one item, I suppose I would choose some sort of wish-granting machine. What about you?
• Fishing is a great way to reduce stress, unless you’re a fish.
• Productivity tip: Instead of “you’re”, always just type “your” – everyone knows it means the same thing!
• Dammit! Got dressed in the dark and just realized I put on two different colored pair of pants...
• Health tip: Eat half whole-wheat pasta or whole half-wheat pasta.
• I don't understand it; I did 20 minutes on the stationary treadmill and didn't even break a sweat...
THE DAILY SCALEY
Traveling out of town, so weighed myself
on luggage scale (max weight: 75 lbs).