Thursday, September 1, 2011
Son of Weight-Loss Tips
• You can make your own rowing machine with two long poles and a rowboat.
• Drink margarinemilk instead of buttermilk.
• Making low-carb "toast" is simple; just replace the slice of bread with something that's not bread.
• Like to eat when you're stressed out? Next time, try having an uncontrollable crying fit instead.
• If you're invited to a wedding, make a note when you RSVP that you'd appreciate them not serving cake because you're on a diet.
• Can't afford fresh fruit? Try dressing up like a gorilla and getting captured by a local zoo.
• If all the others runners in the marathon are wearing leather chaps and feathers, you may have accidentally stumbled into a "Gay Pride" parade.
• Tipping your personal trainer with a counterfeit $100 bill will ensure that your next session will be extra-intensive.