Saturday, June 2, 2012

Some More Fitness Center Pick-up Lines

• "Wanna sit on my lap while I do the rowing machine?"

• "Roses are red, violets are blue, after working out, let's go screw."

• "I wish this gym had a stationary bike built for two…"

• "Hey, want to come to my “Mono is Gone-O” party?"

• "Just call me 'Milk', because I'll do your body good… and like milk, I came from a female. Were you aware that all cows are female? Therefore, when you are drinking milk, it always comes from a female and you will never have a male cow. Male 'cows' are called bulls, dumbass."

• "Hope you took your Flintstone chewables today ‘cause I’m gonna make your Bedrock."

• "Why don’t you come over and watch me do some squats?"

• "Would you like tickets to the gun show? No, I’m not going to show you my biceps, I was trying to ask you out on a date to the gun show, but now this is incredibly awkward…"

• "How much does a polar bear weigh?  Between 885 and 1350 lbs for males and  from 450 to 675 lbs for females. Hi my name is…"

• "I may not be the best-looking guy in here, or the fittest, or the richest, or the smartest, or the best-smelling, or the one who drives the nicest car, or the best dressed, or the funniest, or the... I forgot where I was going with this...”

• "Nice snatch! Man, that would have been better if you’d be working out with a kettlebell…"

The Daily Scaley has been suspended while
my wife Anita and I kick it in New Orleans this weekend.


  1. Pretty funny lines, however I'm not sure how successful they'd be so I'm thinking it's a good thing you're already married! Try to eat at least one meal in New Orleans that's neither breaded and fried or drowned in a fabulous sauce - or both. Hard to do. I personally have a great affection for the oyster po'boy, which I don't think is what they mean when they suggest we eat more fish. And unfortunately, those colorful drinks can't really be counted as a serving of fruit. Sucks, eh?

  2. Gumbo heaven , easy on the rice and spirits and have a ball!

  3. Ooooo how I love New Orleans! I swear if I lived there, I'd be 100 pounds heavier. Best food in the world. :-) Enjoy!



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