Thursday, December 27, 2012

Back on the Strip...

Our story actually begins here if you're a glutton for punishment...






Mr. Dithers: So anyway, this guy at my office is eating pizza and chili and these huge sandwiches and he never… I mean, he NEVER gains a pound. And he’s got a hot wife. It’s not fair!


Hagar:
Jack: Do you have any other employees? I mean, you complain about this one guy all the time. Why not just fire him if he bugs you so much?

PHB: Y
ou should just keep giving him extra assignments until he quits.

Hagar:
Ummmmm… is this the meeting of…um… fat… comic strip characters?

Jack:
You’re in the right place. Take off your pointy hat and pull up a chair, Mister…

Hagar: Hagar the Horrible.

Jack:
Okay, this is Mister Dahorrible. Welcome to T.O.O.N…. Toons Overcoming Obesity Now. And, ummmm… Mister Dahorrible? We don’t really like to label anybody ‘fat’.

Fat Chick:
*ahem*

Jack:
Well, except Fat Chick there from that caveman strip… you know, Fat Chick? That really just feels wrong…

Hagar:
Well, I’m perfectly happy the way I am, but my wife has been giving me some grief lately.

Ziggy: Happiness doesn't depend on how much you have to enjoy ... but how much you enjoy what you have!

Fat Albert:
I’m about to beat yo bald ass!

Sgt Snorkel:
Can we get rid of the gang-banger already?

Fat Albert:
Oh, you think 'cuz I’m African-American I gotta be in a gang?

Walt Duncan:
Well, there are seventeen black kids waiting for you out by the street.

Fat Albert:
Those are the Cosby Kids, bitch.

Jack:
Settle down, let’s get back to Mr Dither’s problem...

Mr. Wilson:
What about the fact that my wife is constantly baking cookies for the brat next door? My house smells like cookies 24/7!

Jack: Excuse me, Cathy? Roger? What’s are you two giggling about?

Charlie Brown: They’re watching youtube videos of me trying to kick a football.

Roger: *snicker* …
she pulls it away… right when… he goes… to *snicker*  kick it…

Cathy:
It’s just… *snicker* … mean.

Jack: Good health is kind of like that, isn’t it? I mean, we get so excited to see positive results, and then…

Charlie Brown:
THEN A PINT-SIZED PSYCHO PULLS THE BALL AWAY AT THE LAST MINUTE!

Hagar:
Ummmm, I think I’m gonna head out now…

Jack:
Okay, but you’re welcome to come back anytime. Remember our motto…

Everyone:
WE’RE NOT FAT… WE’RE JUST DRAWN THAT WAY!

3 comments:

  1. OMGOSH ID SOOO FORGOTTEN ME HAGAR!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Love it.

    The amount of nonsense about weight loss out there is astounding.

    All I'll say is that losing weight is simple, but not easy:

    http://funmylifeteacher.blogspot.com/2012/12/the-reality-of-weight-loss.html

    ReplyDelete
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