Friday, July 6, 2012

What My Scale Might Say If It Could Talk

  • “Get off! Get off! Get off!”
  • “Maybe you’re just retaining fat.”
  • “They say any loss is a good loss. How’s about -.00001 lbs.?”
  • “Here comes the pain!”
  • “Round and round she goes, where she stops, nobody knows.”
  • “When you lose, you take all the credit; when you gain, ya blame me!”
  • “Looks like you’ve got Dunlap’s Disease. Your belly’s done lapped over your belt.”
  • “Ummmmph!”
  • “On the moon, you’d only weigh 43 pounds.”
  • “Why don’t you try again… maybe it’ll be drastically lower.”
  • “And you thought nobody saw you eat those chips…”
  • “Good news: you’re still beating anorexia!”
  • “Does this number make you look fat?”
  • “Tippin’ is encouraged. Get it, get it? Tippin’ the scales… ah, you don’t know funny.”
  • “Are you a glutton for punishment or just a regular glutton?”
  • “For God’s sake–will you please put on some underwear?”
  • “BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA….”
  • “Let’s say we just call it two hundred and plenty?”
  • “I’ve got an idea: today I’ll stand on you and call you a f*ckin’ b*tch.”
  • “Say, are you losing weight?”

THE DAILY SCALEY
Y'know, the snail isn't God's fastest creature,
but he made it to the arc...

8 comments:

  1. OMG THE NEXT TO LAST ONE.
    comedy gold.

    ReplyDelete
  2. LOL!! I'm with MizFit!! THAT one is PRICELESS!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ok, so it looks like you need to turn the next to last one into a t-shirt..I'll buy one ;)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Love it! Great job on the progress this week.

    ReplyDelete
  5. SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FRIGGIN FUNNY!!!!!!! Keep at it Jack - doing great!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Heh, OK, you got me, I'm not going to be able to stand on the scale nekkid again without 'hearing' "For God's sake..."

    ReplyDelete
  7. What a really scary thing if my scale would talk!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Thanks for the laughs!! I love it!

    ReplyDelete

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails