Why I Heart My Weight Loss Blog

I Be Blendin’ Sh*t Up

Okay, so I just paid more for a blender than I did for my first car. It’s a VitaMix, and that bad boy will mix anything you care to mix… frozen fruit, ice, nuts, a block of cheese, a rotary phone, a… well, you get the idea.

It all started at Costco where they had this personable guy demonstrating a big noisy blender, shoving unpeeled kiwis, chunks of mango and handfuls of raw spinach into the machine and turning it all into a delicious drink. I kept watching, expecting to see some sleight-of-hand magic where he threw the spinach behind his back and slipped in some ice cream instead. But the dude had nothing up his sleeve… except my credit card, it turns out.


I brought it home, getting ready to rationalize my impulse purchase when my wife’s face lit up: “A Vita-Mix blender? Awesome. I thought you weren’t paying attention when I told you I wanted that.”

“Yeah, well…” I stammered. “Happy Mother’s Day!”

I’ve been making smoothies, soups, beverages… choppin’ sh*t up like a ninja after a half dozen Red Bulls. I can already tell that I’m eating more raw fruits and veggies, one of the key planks in my weight loss plans. And I made some of the most kick-*ss salsa I’ve ever put in my mouth, and a fondue that would classify as a new form of torture for the CIA.

I like to mix things up with this blog. It only makes sense to mix it up with my diet as well.

No Turning Back

"Be courageous and bold. When you look back on your life,
you'll regret the things you didn't do more than the ones you did."
–Erma Bombeck

I’m proud of myself, and I’m proud of you.

I’ve started following a sh*tload of weight loss blogs, and just about every one of them gives me a shot of adrenaline, a boost in my daily struggles and a renewed sense of purpose as I make my own path to this distant shining city we’re all seeking.

We’re doing it, people.

We really are.

Some days are better than others, but haven’t some days always been better than others? There are setbacks, to be sure, but when I bounce around the blogosphere, I see more stories of success than admissions of defeat. I see more reasons to smile than excuses to cringe. I see optimism. I see anticipation. I see hope.

We’re making a change.

For the better.

For good.

I’ve been at this for nearly a month now, and I’m finally getting my rhythm, feeling like… well… like a weight is being lifted, from my body and from my soul.

I haven’t gone far yet, but I’ve gone far enough to know I can’t turn back now. I’m not going to quit, because you’re not going to quit. We’re in this for the long haul, whatever it takes, however long it takes.

We may have a lot to lose (I know I do), but we’ve got even more to gain.

Reasons NOT to Lose Weight

• Shame to waste all my “fat” pants
• 25-lb. bags of potato chips at Costco make unhealthy lifestyle extremely affordable
• Time spent weight loss blogging could easily be filled with TV watching
• Less sweaty gym clothes = less laundry
• Might miss out on playing Santa Claus at holiday parties
• Easier to maintain casual friendships with all those fast food drive-thru workers
• Don’t have to answer that embarrassing “Are you losing weight?” question
• Good excuse to wear sweatpants in public
• Don’t have to worry about a lot of leftovers cluttering up fridge
• Get more for your money at “all-you-can-eat” buffet
• Answer to all life’s problems? Gravy
• Have kick-*ss health insurance to deal with any weight-related problems
• Have gotten good at punching new holes in belt with screwdriver
• Guy that owns the local Ben & Jerry’s franchise really wants me back

I dunno. I make a pretty compelling argument, but I think I’m gonna stick with the plan.

Scale Not So Sh*tty After all

Mid-Weekly weigh-in: 268.1
Loss: 3.7 lbs
Total loss: 22.4 lbs.
Emotion: Scale smitten

I knew that my Sunday weigh-in didn't feel quite right, so I broke my 0nce-a-week tradition and hopped on the scale this morning. I was hoping to see at least the gain from last week erased, but was pleasantly surprised to post a whopping number.

Scale, I take back all those ugly things I said about you (at least until you turn on me again, you uncaring, two-timing b*tch).

Welcome, My Friends, to the Show That Never Ends

That’s the theme for today’s ramblings… the on-and-on-and-on nature of what lies ahead of me, of you, of all of us.

This has to be about more than losing 20 lbs., losing 50 lbs., losing 100 lbs. It needs to be about a life change, a realization (and acceptance) that the old ways, the old habits, the old mindsets produced a person that wasn’t comfortable in his own ever-expanding skin.

I want to feel better about myself.

I want to feel better.

I want…

• …to take off my shirt when I mow the lawn
• …to be a good example to my family
• …look good in clothes again
• …to be proud of myself
• …to continue playing hoops against guys half my age
• …to go swimming without feeling self-conscious
• …to end my self-destructive weight loss/gain yo-yo-ing
• …to eat right… and like it
• …to look in the mirror and see the person I see inside my head
• …to understand that I am the master of my destiny, the captain of my soul

I hope that you and I have the strength, the drive and the perseverance to make this the journey of our lives.

Hold the Cinco de Mayo

I've only had one beer in the last three weeks (a Taj Mahal at my fav Indian restaurant), but my will is going to be sorely tested at my office Cinco de Mayo party this afternoon. We're shutting down early and having a chips, salsa and Corona fiesta. I'm planning to stay away from the chips and nurse a single bottle of beer like it's only got a week to live.

Here's a fun trick for your own Cinco de Mayo festivities.

Quick: which was fewer calories?

Shot of tequila (JQ) has three less calories for those keeping count (i.e. all of us).