Monday, June 1, 2015

Jack Does Mother Goose (Wow, That Sounds Dirty!)

Goosey Goosey Goose

Goosey Goosey Goose, always making some excuse.
“I’m too tired, I’m too sore, I can’t work out anymore.
I’ve got houseguests, I’ve got a job, my kids are underfoot.”
And then doesn’t understand it when all the pounds stay put.

Yesterday Upon the Scale

Yesterday upon the scale 

I saw a weight that make me wail.
And so I changed the things I do.
Today I saw a loss. Woo hoo!

Sing a Song of Six Pounds

Sing a song of six pounds,

A loss upon the scale
Four and twenty workouts
That plus eating well.
When the month was over,

The results could not be clearer
Isn’t that a fitter dude

He sees there in the mirror?

Not-So-Simple Simon

Simple Simon met a pieman,
When he was at the mall.
Says Simple Simon to the pieman,
“I’ll take an extra small.”
Says the pieman to Simple Simon,
“You can supersize it for a 25¢ charge.”
Says Simple Simon to the pieman,
“How do you think I got so large?”

Solomon Chunky
Solomon Chunky,
Began on Monday,
Chinese on Tuesday,
Buffet on Wednesday,
Happy Hour Thursday,
Pizza on Friday,
Dieted on Saturday,
Gained on Sunday,
Nothing ends For Solomon Chunky
Slow, Slow, Slow Your Bloat
Slow, slow, slow your bloat.
Don’t eat so much ice cream.
Healthy, healthy, healthy, healthy.
Live the life you dream.

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