Dammit, I Forgot the Clever Headline Again!

As I was walking around the neighborhood, I noticed a little old man lazily rocking in a chair on his porch.

I approached him, holding up a hand in greeting.

“I couldn't help noticing how happy you look,” I remarked. “Do you mind if I ask you something?”

 “Go ahead,” he answered.

“What's your secret for a long happy life?” I asked, taking a seat on the porch steps to await his reply.

“Well, I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day," he started. "I also drink a case of whiskey a week, I eat fatty fried foods most every day… oh, and I never, ever exercise.”

“That's amazing,” I said. “Wait… just how old are you?”

“Twenty-six,” he replied.

"The doctor of the future will give no medicines,
but will interest his patients in the care of the
human frame, in diet, and in the causes
and prevention of disease."
~Thomas Edison