• Glove compartment inexplicably filled with freshly prepared bacon
• Nurse who administers flu shot gives you candy apple for being so brave
• You go to answer you cellphone, only it turns out to be a Hershey bar
• Sample lady at grocery store holds you down and squirts entire can of Cheese Whiz down your throat
• The blog post you spent 45 minutes writing turns out to just be the words “ICE CREAM” repeated 700 times
• When you pointed to an item on the menu, the waitress thought you ordered the entire menu
• For some strange reason, your manicurist is having you soak your fingers in barbecue sauce
• Shipment from Donut-of-the-Month Club arrives
• You pour yourself a steaming cup of coffee, but then realize that
someone filled the carafe with rotel dip
• Waitress forgets to bring your hot fudge on the side when she drops
off your sundae
• Multi-vitamins you’ve been taking turn out to be Sugar Babies
• Have to call off your workout because somebody's on your lucky treadmill
• Neighbor brings by a bunch of freshly picked cotton candy
• Forgot it was weigh-in day and wore your chain-mail socks
• 100-calorie bagel you had for breakfast turns out to be 1,000-calorie one instead
• You’re at work, and the conveyor belt that delivers the chocolate candy that you’re supposed to wrap speeds up like crazy…
->
The fried snickers you ate turns out to be a fried snickers.
ReplyDeleteAny reference to an I Love Lucy episode deserves a big high-five!! Thanks for all the laughs!
ReplyDeleteYou have no idea how much some of those resonate with me this week! Seriously! Struggle struggle ... as I eat a big ole pot roast with bbq sauce. Minus the pot roast.
ReplyDeleteVee at http://veegettinghealthy.blogspot.com
So, on Sundays at the gym, I've noticed a new trend. In front of the two tvs that show Sunday afternoon football, there are two guys on bikes, two guys on the elipticals behind them and two guys on the treadmills behind THEM. You should have seen the guy that got there late. I thought he was going to drop kick someone to get off of "his" bike.
ReplyDeleteI may need to purchase new vitamins- I was under the impression that if I missed a sugar baby, I could just hunker down with the sugar daddy and gnaw my way to health! Shoot.
ReplyDeleteDonut of the month...yum! I actually might just do that. Allow one donut a month! ha!
ReplyDeleteI think I actually saw this one happen at Walmart once: "Sample lady at grocery store holds you down and squirts entire can of Cheese Whiz down your throat " hehhe.....and I used to have a lucky elliptical, Id wait for it!
ReplyDeleteIce cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream.
ReplyDeleteThe 3,000 boxes of Girl Scout cookies your daughter sold arrives.
ReplyDeleteHey! Don't underestimate the power of the lucky treadmill. ;)
ReplyDeletePlease provide link to Donut of the Month Club.
ReplyDeleteThat is one evil Sample Lady.
ReplyDeleteThis list was exceptionally funny.
Hilarious!
ReplyDeleteYesterday I received free samples of buttercream frosted sugar cookies and an enormous tin of three kinds of popcorn.
ReplyDeleteNot a word of a lie.
Only crumbs are now left.
I need to stop agreeing to do product reviews for tasty junk food...
(though I don't think I'd be upset if my glove compartment was full of fresh bacon ;)).
I needed this laugh today :)
ReplyDeleteRewarding yourself after a hard workout - with a deep-dish pizza! LOL!!!
ReplyDeleteMy weight loss blog (and it's informative!)
http://eftweightlosswaterparks.blogspot.com
Number 1 happens to me all the time. I've learned to deal by making workout gear out of it.
ReplyDelete