More Things That Will Get You Kicked Out of a WW Meeting

• Coming in with your Jenny Craig posse and trying to start a rumble

• Attempting to bribe scale operator with freshly baked cookies

• Insisting that bottle caps and string be accepted as payment

• Selling bootleg WW charms out of the trunk of your Trans Am in the parking lot

• Trimming your toenails during meeting

• Threatening the scale lady to give you a good weigh-in or you’ll key up her car

• Loudly eating a dozen candy apples during meeting

• Taking a dump on the scale if it shows a gain

• Standing on a chair and screaming “Me so hungry!” over and over and over and over

• Trying to get in free my wearing your mask of David Kirchhoff, President and CEO of Weight Watchers International

• Wearing your candy thong and fruit leather chaps

• Non-stop riverdancing on scale while they’re trying to weigh you in

• Loudly insisting that your weight be written in invisible ink

• Parking in the meeting room

• Paying with a VISA card you just stole from another member

Things That'll Get You Kicked Out of a WW Meeting

• Loudly challenging everyone in the room to a caramel apple-eating contest

• Wearing a Sumo wrestling outfit to meeting
  
  
• Bringing a more forgiving scale and offering “second opinion” weigh-ins for $5
  
  
• Standing on your chair and singing “I Like Big Butts” at the top of your lungs
  
  
• Picking a fight with somebody because she’s sitting in your “lucky chair”
  
  
• Cleaning your gun during meeting
  
  
• Screaming “I’M SO DAMN HUNGRY” every five minutes
  
  
• Wearing pants made out of fruit leather
  
  
• Taking bets during weigh-ins
  
  
• Trying to organize a séance during meeting
  
  
• Loudly repeating every single word the leader says
  
  
• Repainting the wall because you claim the wall color is responsible for your recent weight gain
  
  
• Wheeling in a wagon filled with steaming hot taco meat
  
  
• Excessive public flossing
  
  
• Spending entire meeting making elaborate candy corn sculptures
  
  
• Dressing up like a giant Gummi Bear and prancing around the room during meeting
  
  
• Trying to sign people up to your knock-off weight loss program “Weight Watchpersons” at a booth in the restroom
  
  
• Trying to hook up your own hammock to sit in
  
  
• Insisting on weighing in nude

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