Monday, September 30, 2013

My Oh My My MRI

Okay, so I hurt my shoulder.

How? You ask.

I’m not exactly sure, to tell you the truth.

Maybe I dove into a rushing river to save a drowning baby. 

Maybe I ran into a burning building and lifted a giant armoire in order to save a drowning baby.

Maybe I slept on it wrong.

Anyway, I went to the doctor after a couple of weeks of nagging pain. He took x-rays which confirmed what we both thought:  that I have bones underneath my skin.

“We need to do an MRI,” he told me.

So we scheduled the procedure and I showed up bright and early, excited about the prospect of being shoved into a tube only a quarter-of-an-inch bigger than I am. 

Usually when I’m stripped down to my socks and underwear, it means I’m in for an afternoon of watching football, but this morning it’s MRI funtime!

I’m mentally prepared for the claustrophobia and unnerving loudness (I laid down the day before with my head two feet from a railroad track to get ready for the noise), but I wasn’t ready for the nurse to twist my arm sideways and jam it forcibly against my side.

“How does that feel?” she chirped.

“Really, really uncomfortable,” I winced.

“Okay,” she smiled. “Just hold it like that for 20 minutes and we’ll be good to go.”

She placed a rubber bulb in my left hand and told me to squeeze it in case of an emergency. Thirty seconds later, the bulb feel out of my grasp just as I was getting ready to squeeze (due to fact that I was uncomfortable, angry and bored).

Fourteen hours later (maybe more), I emerged and was told I could get dressed and leave.

It was the worst thing I’d ever experienced.

Until I got the bill five minutes later.

AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!






11 comments:

  1. Yikes hope you find out what the problem is and get on the road to recovery soon! I had to do an MRI for my back earlier this year and it really wasn't that bad to me but I wasn't contorted into an uncomfortable position before being sent into the machine...and the loud noises kind of reminded me of some hard electro music!

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  2. keep us posted.
    on the mri and how youre recovering from the bill as well :-)

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  3. When I had my torn shoulder tendon, they looked at it by rubbing one of those ultrasound thingies all over my shoulder (kind of like a giant dildo, in fact I've had an "internal" examination with one as well when pregnant so maybe they are dual purpose) and they could see a grey blur on the screen that apparently meant something to them. They didn't have to put me in the MRI machine. Which I wouldn't have minded as I like cosy little spaces.

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  4. I had to have an MRI before they diagnosed my MS. No, it was not fun and I can relate! I hope you don't ever have to go through another one. BzzzZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzBzzzzzzzzzBZZZZZZZZZZZZZbZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzBzzzzzzzzz… … … etc

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  5. You know they have open air MRIs, right?

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  6. Well that's a bummer all the way around...hehe. Get well soon and I hope you get a good prognosis!

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  7. Yikes, that doesn't sound like a fun process. Hope everything turns out okay!

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  8. Wowzer, the MRI doesn't sound good, keep us posted on the results. Hope the bill wasn't too bad either!

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  9. OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!! Hope it is nothing serious!!!!!

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  10. At least when I had an MRI, I was knocked out cold! Get better soon, Jack!

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  11. Yeah, MRIs are expensive, but they are an amazing and safe way to find problems. I hope yours show nothing serious. Good luck!

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