I'm sorry, Biggie Smalls
Uh-ha, it's all good baby bay-bee, uh
I used to love ice cream.
Liked to eat warmed-up taco supreme.
Salt ‘n peppered and chewed it up like a wolverine.
Makin’ pizza rolls disappear.
Every Saturday chip attack, fast food, drinkin’ beer.
I ate a cheddar block ‘til my belt popped.
Chewin’ pie and eatin’ Thai, sippin' on Shiner Bock.
Way back, when I was the big-and-fat plumper Jack.
Was too fat to scratch.
Remember feelin’ I was done, couldn’t turn it on.
I never thought that I’d let my body get so far gone.
There I was in the spotlight with my pants tight.
Feelin’ so low, like a couple levels ‘neath the cellar floor.
Body abuser, the opposite of a loser.
Back then I didn’t much think about my future.
Thanks to MizFit, Monica at runeatrepeat,
Katy Widrick, Bombshell and No Meat Athlete,
I’m slimmin’ up like I dreamed I would.
Exercising and eating like I should.
It’s all good.
Uh, and if you don't know, now you know, you know…
You never know just how good health can feel.
Being fit makes you happy, not a Happy Meal.
It’s time to go, time to get it in gear
‘Cause you can do this thing, it’s gonna be your year.
I made the change from a lard-ass punk.
Like Earth, Wind & Fire, was livin’ in a funk.
Now I’m closer to goal, workin’ out every day.
Blog and tweet, that’s the Jack Sh*t way.
Yeah, sometimes I still get the hungries,
But wanna fit into my dungarees.
Now I write posts ‘cause I’m compelled to.
I never thought I could be healthy, free of this belly.
I found new ways and new goals to propel me.
Now I’m on it like almond butter on melba toast.
Writing about my progress on another blog post.
Eatin’ better, exercisin’ And joggin’.
If you’re around, come hear me speak at Fitbloggin’.
Livin’ life with new purpose,
The ringmaster of my own 3-ring health circus.
Lunches, crunches, stubborn as a mule.
Considered a fool ‘cause I break every blogging rule.
Committed to this course til’ I’m dead or even deader,
And I’ve never felt better.
Uh... and if you don't know, now you know, you know
You never know just how good health can feel.
Being fit makes you happy, not a Happy Meal.
It’s time to go, time to get it in gear
‘Cause you can do this thing, it’s gonna be your year.
New running shoes, a C25K veteran.
Run miles and miles at a time? You bet I can.
Fifty leg lifts, sixty-minute spinnin’ class.
Smaller jeans, I’m wearing on my thinnin’ ass.
I may never have a six-pack, dawg,
But I’m still kickin’ ass on my Sh*t Jack blog.
And all my friends are losing.
Weighin’ less every day, less body abusing.
Thinkin’ back when I was outta control.
Workin’ the shovel, trying to dig myself outta of a hole.
But now I can look in a mirror and not grimace.
Smile every time I think of myself and my fitness.
Now I’m working to improve every part of my life.
Be a better husband to Anita, my wife.
It’s a new day, bid-fat-adieu day.
Funny when you look, you can find yourself a new way.
And damn right I like my physique more fit.
Don’t know that, you don’t know Jack Sh*t.
And it’s all…
(It’s all good).
... and if you don't know, now you know, you know
Uh, uh... and if you don't know, now you know, you know
Uh... and if you don't know, now you know, you know
Representin' Blog-Town in the house, Junior Mints, mad flavor, uh
Uh, yeah, a-ight baybeh baybeh
