Monday, July 22, 2013

How to Make Everyone at the Gym Hate You

• Lick the sweat off machine after using it

• Sing “Row Row Row Your Boat” at top of your lungs while doing rowing machine

• Sit down on person’s stomach while they’re doing bench presses

• Leave your tube of cookie dough in the elliptical cupholder

• Tell everyone you meet that your workout gloves are made of human skin

• Jog backwards on the treadmill

• Do pose-downs in front of the mirror for hours at a time

• Stand there tapping your foot and sighing audibly as soon as somebody gets on machine you want

• Wear your “Registered Sex Offender” t-shirt

• Attempt to pay personal trainer with car wash coupons

• Bring a boombox and loudly play non-stop Jimmy Buffet medley

• Tie yoga mats to your arms and run around flapping like a bird, screaming “Look at me! I can fly, bitches!”


  1. LMAO. Thanks for that one this morning!

  2. I think doing these things at my gym would make me legendary!

  3. You know, the funny thing is that I do some of these things unintentionally. Next time I go to the gym I will be paranoid. Thank's for creating more problems for me Jack!!! :)

  4. LOL Jack. It is funny because it is true. I am lucky enough NOT to do these things but I know some people that do and it annoys the sh*t out of me. x

  5. Haha now I know why nobody wants to talk to me at the gym!!

  6. Haha, these actually seem like they will be fun to try. Besides, I normally land up just doing the 'celebrity workout', just working the arms and mouth.



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