Monday, June 3, 2013

Even More Phrases You Don’t Want to Hear From Your Doctor

“Nurse! Come see how fat this patient is!”

“I’m going to give you a prescription for something that will make all food taste like celery.”

“Your cholesterol levels are bad, but I’m especially worried about your pudding levels.”

“You see this spot on the x-ray; that’s blue cheese dressing. Haven’t we talked about you not bringing a bucket of wings to your appointment?”

“Do I think you’re going to die soon? I can’t believe you’ve hung around this long!”

“I’m going to send you to a specialist in cheese addiction.”

“You see, when I hit your knee with my little hammer to check your reflexes, it’s not supposed to get stuck like that.”

“No, I won’t trade you a urine sample for a frozen custard.”

“Well, there’s at least one piece of good news: your case is going to allow me to buy my wife a new BMW convertible.”

“Wow, you’re in even worse shape than that Jack Sh*t fellow I saw this morning…”


  1. I especially liked the x-ray and blue cheese. Also the little hammer. For a long time the little hammer sank in my knees!

  2. If you avoid going to the doctor and live in denial you can be sure to avoid having to hear these comments. Just offering solutions here!



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