Suddenly, they came across a bear.
One man took off his pack, pulled out a pair of running shoes, and started to put them on. The friend frantically cried out, “You can't outrun that bear.”
“I don't need to,” the other man calmly replied. “I only need to outrun you.”
Upon hearing this plan, the man whipped a lead pipe out of his pack and cracked it against his buddy’s knees, then took off running.
Moral of the story: it’s okay to have a plan, but you don’t need to run your mouth about it before you enact it.
Secret weight loss moral of the story: Don’t tell people that you’re on a diet; do it and let them take notice when the results kick in. Also, don’t mess with bears.