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Monday, November 22, 2010

When Sh*tty Things Happen to Good People

Bear with me, because I don’t use this space as a daily diary very often. I started to just knock out a silly post because, frankly, that’s what I most get a kick out of doing. However, it just didn’t seem right to do that, considering everything that’s been going on around here…

Just to bring you up to speed, my wife Anita underwent emergency eye surgery a few weeks ago. During the week and a half she spent on her side recuperating, she became convinced that there was a hole in her retina. She went to the doctor a couple of times, but they suggested waiting and seeing how it progressed. Well, it progressed and progressed, to the point where she had to go in for a second emergency procedure. It’s easy to get mad at doctors, but it’s not so easy to find their car in the parking lot and key it up (hint: it’s usually a BMW).

The scary thing (well, let’s face it… there are lots of scary things when it comes to cutting around on your eyeball), is that this is the same road she went down with her other eye. A dozen or more surgeries before she completely lost her vision. So there’s been a little bit of a “freak out” factor this go-round.

It’s still too early to say everything’s going to be fine, but she’s back on her side, trying to remain as immobile as possible for at least a week while her eye heals.

As for me, I’m trying to keep her head screwed on while also trying to keep our house from falling apart. Laundry’s been the biggest hurdle, but I have a new strategy: I’m going to start throwing away all the dirty clothes and buying exact duplicates to replace them with. Yes, it’s a lot of work, but think how much I’ll save on laundry detergent!

Exercise has gone out the window for the most part, partly because there’s no time and partly because… well, I find it really difficult to tell the person I love most on this earth that I’m going out running while she’s stuck in one position in bed.

Anyway, thanks so much for your thoughtful comments, supportive emails and warm wishes. Blogging can’t be much of a priority right now, but I’ll be around as much as possible given the circumstances.

Take care of yourself, take care of your loved ones and be thankful for your good health (and eyesight).




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68 comments:

  1. don't forget to take care of you, so you can be a good caregiver for Anita... she needs you to be good and strong and healthy.

    praying for you both, Jack.

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  2. Wow, I'm sorry to hear that, you will both be in my prayers. Best of luck!

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  3. So sorry for what you all are going through. I wish for her a speedy recovery and a peaceful week for your family. And the laundry? How in the world did you discover my secret?

    Have a Happy Thanksgiving!

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  4. Thank you for sharing this with us! I'm sorry that you guys are going through this! You and your wife are in my prayers!

    As for finding the dr's car to key it up, I say just find the closest beemer and have at it...

    Take care!

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  5. I'm so sorry jack. Please make sure you tell Anita that all of us are rooting for her. Sending you guys good wishes!

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  6. Anita is so fortunate to have your love and support. Thinking of you both and sending the best healing vibes EVER. (and they're from woo-woo California, so they are doubly effective!!)

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  7. Sending good healing thoughts for Anita and good supportive thoughts to you and your family during this trying time.

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  8. Good wishes and vibes from the UK too. I hope Anita's recovery is speedy xx

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  9. I'm sorry to hear about Anita I hope she heals up and you both make it through this week ok. I'm praying for you both.

    As for the laundry give it to the kids to do, it may mean wearing pink underwear but maybe that will brighten your day.

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  10. Eeek, that's awful, Jack. My friend's retina started to detach, but they fixed it. Same thing happened to her mom not long before that. That's pretty scary stuff. I hope Anita will be okay.

    I like your laundry plan.

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  11. Best laundry strategy ever.

    Hang in there, NJ. All of you.

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  12. hugs and prayers for you and your family

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  13. I am so sorry that you and your wife are going through this. It must be so hard for her. Best Wishes for a quick recovery.

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  14. Like everyone, I'm so sorry you're all having to go through a tough time right now and all the best wishes and prayers with you and your family. Unlike everyone else (because that's how I roll), if you don't take care of yourself first, you won't be any good for anyone else. When the airmasks drop from the ceiling...what are the rules? ;) Brilliant plan with the laundry too. Love it! Happy Thanksgiving.

    Oh and you can tell Pisa that I finally did it...thanks to her. Punk Rope is now in Seattle starting December 4th. Thanks Pisa! Thanks Jack! I needed a good kick in the ass.

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  15. Thinking of you and her, my friend. Sincerely hoping for a miraculous recovery.

    My best always,
    Sean

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  16. Family always comes first. Take care of your lovely wife and family and house. Everything else is not important. Sending prayers. Gracie

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  17. Jack, I am so sorry. What a worry, for you all. I hope, truly hope, that things are beginning to be a little easier on you all, and that Anita's eye heals, and heals fast.

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  18. All good thoughts and prayers coming your way. Don't you worry about a thing, we'll be here whenever you can stop by!

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  19. oh Jack...I'm sorry you and your fam is going through this..I really wish a speedy for Anita.

    Its sad but true, you normally arent grateful for good health and all limbs until you are faced with a crisis,emergency. My time at Walter Reed has really pounded that into my head.

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  20. Thinking good thoughts for you and Anita...

    Keep in mind that you have someone living nearby who's most willing to help out. Someone unemployed and starting to get the teensiest bit bored. Someone who knows her way around a laundry room (but draws the line at ironing.) Sing out if there's anything I can do!

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  21. So sorry Jack. If I lived closer I'd give you a hand with the laundry too! Will be thinking of Anita and you and your family!!

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  22. So sorry to hear about your wife Jack and what you both are going thru. It does to show you that as always WE are in charge of our health care and you must be proactive whenever something isn't quite right. I wish you both all the best and will say a prayer that she gets better and her vision is restored. Understandably you have your hands full.

    As for the laundry, here's an old college trick. Anything that isn't white, put in together and wash in cold with one of those "color catchers". Unless of course you have something really really saturated with color, then separately. Hey, when you had to pay for each load, it worked!

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  23. Take care of your wife & family! I hope she heals and there are no more issues with her eye.

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  24. I'll be thinking about you and your wife, both. You've got a lot to take care of right now. Don't forget to take care of Jack, because this blog wouldn't be sh.t without you.

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  25. I'm sorry for what she is going through. Hang in there.

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  26. Oh Jack! I'm so sorry for the stress and worry.

    Laundry? One load at a time, Dude, one load at a time. It doesn't ALL have to be finished at once, despite what you may have been told.

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  27. Thinking of you and anita! Hang in there!

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  28. Jack concentrate on what maters to you most. When you feel stressed and think ' Help I haven't done........' just ask yourself if in 10 years time it will matter that you didn't do whatever it was right now? Will you even remember in 10 years you didn't do it right now? Hope your wife recovers soon. You will both be in my thoughts and prayers

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  29. Oh Jack, what a scary time for you, Anita and your family. I will keep Anita in my prayers.

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  30. Prayers go out to you and your family. Keep yourself healthy so you can be the best person for your wife.

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  31. Praying for your wife. Emergency anythings are not good. Praying she will be healed and back to good soon.

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  32. I'm so sorry you are all going through that. I'll keep Anita in my thoughts and I hope her retina heals this time.

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  33. "hugs" to your wife! That must be so scary.
    Take care of yourself as well but definitely be there for Anita.
    Hope the eye is is resolved this time.
    I'm keeping you both in my thoughts and prayers.

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  34. How totally stressful, for both of you. I'm so sorry to hear she is facing that. I pray Anita's eye makes a full recovery.
    Loretta
    =^..^=

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  35. Jack -

    As much as you've given of yourself to all your invisible blog friends here, I think I can speak for all of us when I say:

    Take as much time as you need to concentrate on Anita, you, and your daughter. When things start looking up again (as we are all praying that they will), we will be here waiting for you.

    XOXOXOXOX

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  36. will be keeping you (and your wife) in my thoughts.

    ((hugs))

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  37. Prayers for you and Anita. So sorry you both have to go through this.

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  38. What a terrible thing for Anita to have to go through. Thank God she has such a caring and wonderful husband.

    I think you should declare a blog sabbatical - you deserve it and your wife needs all of you now.

    And screw the exercise.

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  39. A freaking Men to that last line Jack! You do the same please! Prayers are being sent your way!

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  40. I'm thinking about you & Anita. Lots of positivity being sent your way.

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  41. Hang in there, all of you. Best wishes going out to you and to your family.

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  42. Hang in there, Jack! My favorite saying to myself in times like these is that there is always someone who would want to be in my position- may it be that my poor health is better than theirs, my weight is less than theirs, etc.

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  43. You are both in my thoughts and prayers. Hang in there, Jack.

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  44. Hope everything works out and she's better really soon!

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  46. Thinking about you and Anita and wishing and hoping for the very best for her. Eyes are so very precious and hearing about something like this should make us all very grateful for our vision. Also grateful for everything that is right with us and not wrong with us...

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  47. So sorry you are going through this- by you, I mean all of you. Hang in there, fight through it, and lots of other meaningful cliches.

    Seriously- I'll be praying for you guys.

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  48. I'm so sorry that she (and you) are having to endure this. I hope she (and you) are feeling back to your old selves soon!

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  49. I am with Foodie McBody...just up the road actually so I double that WOO WOO and send good mojo your way....

    Whatever you need...you take for you...we will all be here when you have time ......

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  50. Hi Jack, best wishes to you and Anita while she recovers. We readers will be here when you are back to regular postings, and I'm sure Anita will be reading along with us!! (and I heard a rumour that if you can't get to the store, underwear turned inside out buys you another day. :) )

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  51. Sorry to hear about that Jack, thanks for letting us in to this part of your life. It does impact your health, that's for sure. Best wishes and good luck.

    P.S. I drive a bimmer. Be nice. :-)

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  52. Jack, prayers that everything will turn out for the best.

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  53. Take care you sweet man. Same thing happened to my spouse (both eyes, more than once) and it is a very trying experience, especially the trying to keep spouse still part! Just a heads up...the likelihood of catarac surgery is very high after retina repairs. Keep an eye out. Doh! Bad pun.

    hugs,
    Jill

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  54. Take good care of Anita and you. Like the laundry idea, but it could get a little pricey. Prayers for a complete recovery for Anita.

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  55. I will pray for anita's recovery. And going for a run is a big way to burn off some tensions.
    hints for laundry..pssst (kids can do it...I know....don't let them know you know...just sneak up and pounce.)
    Get the kids involved with the chores. Keep yourself up or anita won't have anyone to count on..best wishes sent you's guyses way...lol bad grammar.
    hugs.

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  56. always a lurker... never a poster... until now. Just wanted to offer my best wishes to Anita, you, and the rest of the family.

    John

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  57. xo
    we've been there and it, well, sucks.
    I hate to say go for a run but I saw how much better my mom was able to support my dad when she did SOMETHING that was for her.

    even fleetingly.

    Carla

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  58. Thinking of you and Anita. Hope, hope, hope it's all good for you two.

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  59. HUGS Jack & to your wife too! I did a thankful post today & what you are going thru says it.. thankful for health & being alive!

    Hang in there. all I can say is do what is right for family first! Food is a big part of the weight equation so if you can keep that under control & maybe do some body weight stuff at home... you should be fine!

    We are all thinking of you & Anita!

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  60. * Absolutely get kids to help.
    * When close neighbors and friends ask if they can do something, give them something (laundry, sitting with Anita while you run).
    * Go for the run. I'm sure Anita is telling you this, too.
    * Know that a huge wave of prayerful and healing energy is being sent your and Anita's way.

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  61. Wishing Anita a speedy recovery! Take care of yourself Jack. We love you.

    Sara, VA

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  62. Hang in there Jack! Hard times have to pass by before the good times to come...Been reading your blog for a while, and I know that your a tuff soldier and you should never give up!

    Ill pray that everything turns out ok with Anita!

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  63. Dude you need to cut the sh*t and go for a run anyway. Because Anita needs a husband who has taken care of himself in order to be a better guy for her. Exercise will keep you in your routine, relieve stress, fight depression, and will keep stress weight off your frame. You've worked so hard, don't let sh*t get in the way.

    Lots of prayers and good wishes for Anita and her eye. Maybe run to the library and stock up on good books on tape? I really hope she recovers well.

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  64. Hang tough and I so hope all turns out OK with your wife! But do take care of yourself as well. Denying yourself the run won't help Anita and going for a run might help your stress levels.

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  65. Sending good thoughts and prayers your way Jack. Hope Anita`s recovery is smooth and quick!

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  66. and another one adding that you and yours are in my thoughts - sending you loads of positive vibes x

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  67. My husband went through something similar last year when his retina became detached. The insanely active person was going crazy having to stay immobile on the sofa. Sending good healing vibes to your wife!

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