• Though it sounds like it would be a time-saver, don’t take a month full of pre-natal vitamins at one time.
• Don't smoke or allow yourself to be exposed to secondhand, thirdhand or fourthhand smoke (a little fifthhand smoke never hurt anybody).
• DHA deficiency is very common and it is critical that pregnant women get adequate fish oils so that their baby can develop healthy and optimal brain tissue, so make sure you get plenty of oily fish in your diet.
• Pesticides on food is not healthy for your unborn child, so resist the urge to spray a bunch of pesticides on your food before eating.
• Adequate folic acid early in a baby's development helps prevent neurological defects such as spina bifida, which is apparently a real thing and not an 80’s hair band.
• Avoid sugar-free junk foods and junk-free sugar foods.
• If you’re planning to breast-feed, do not get the face of a scary monster tattooed on your boob.
I spent all yesterday at my sister-in-law's baby shower, so this is very appropriate!
ReplyDeleteDon't forget this piece of advice: Yes, you are eating for two, but one of those people is very very small and doesn't need more than three or four cupcakes at a time.
...what if they're mini cupcakes? ;-)
Deleteoh great there goes my new tattoo idea I was planning! :)
ReplyDeleteI hereby volunteer to eat all the cupcakes and drink all the wine that the pregnant ladies are foregoing. The pesticide shots, er sorry, someone else can chug those.
ReplyDeleteAwesome advice as usual, Mr. Sh*t.
A humorous baby book. Novelty item. You could do that. So many possibilties for you, dead Jack. Ooops.... "dear" Jack. #typo
ReplyDeleteHi everyone,
ReplyDeleteI am new to Jacksh*t, but I am loving the posts. As a doctor of sport and exercise psychology, I encourage everyone to find humor in their lives. Jacksh*t is by far the most fun, but also insightful blog I have come across - well done!
Thanks, Haley. Your check is in the mail.
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ReplyDeleteMy mom smoked while she was pregnant with me. That was just the thing to do back in the day. No wonder I am like this now. :)
ReplyDeleteOMH where do you come up with this stuff!
ReplyDelete" If you’re planning to breast-feed, do not get the face of a scary monster tattooed on your boob." Bwaaahaaahaaaa. Maybe that explains my children's fascinations with horror! ;-)
ReplyDeleteBahahaha....this is amazing stuff. It's so good to belly laugh, especially since trying to lose weight can get so darn depressing at times.
ReplyDeleteThank you Mr Sh*t :-)
thank you for sharing.
ReplyDeletehere some tips to lose weight after Pregnant.
Eat Sensibly, Stay Hydrated, Talk to Your Doctor about Exercise, Start with Slow and Consistent Workouts, Mix Up Your Exercise Routine, Focus on Your Core Muscles, Have a Workout Buddy and Be Patient and Realistic.
I’d like to look extra posts like this. :)
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ReplyDelete