Jack: I really wish you’d put a sock in it.
Devil: ICCCCCCE CREAM SAMMMMMICH!
Jack: I really wish my good angel was still on my other shoulder to balance you out...
Devil: He’s back, dumbass. YO, GOODIE-TWO-SHOES!
Angel: Oh hey.
Devil: What up my brother from an angel mother?
Angel: Just been chilling at Heaven’s 7-11, my Devil dawg.
Jack: You know, you two really aren’t supposed to be friends…
Angel: What’s his problem?
Devil: Oh, you know Jack. He’s upset no matter whether he's not losing weight or if he’s gaining weight.
Jack: Y'know. I really could have used some "good angel" help this week…
Angel: I'm more of a "pretty good angel," actually.
Devil: I still don’t see no ice cream sammich in your hand, Big J.
Jack: I tell ya… between him telling me to be bad and you telling me… well… nothing, it’s a wonder I have any success at all.
Angel: Hey, excuse me for taking a lil’ vacation, bitch!
Jack: I’m not saying you have to do any heavy lifting, but just a little bit of help now and again…
Devil: You see what I’ve been dealing with?
Angel: Let’s go get some beer and wings.
Devil: Wings! I see what you did there. Man, it’s good to have you back!
Jack: *sigh*
Have a wonderful holiday Jack!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteFrom the Wizard of Oz: Are you a good witch, or an ice cream sandwich?
ReplyDeleteFrom Little Shop of Horrors: Feed Me, Feed Me!
From me: Have a lovely holiday that you enjoy guilt-free!