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Thursday, September 24, 2009

I’m Sorry, Prince

I was daydreamin' when I wrote this.
Forgive me if I blunder, man.

But when I woke up this mornin'
Coulda sworn I was in Onederland.

The birds were all singin’,
I was dancing in my underwear

Before I was all chubby,
But now I feel as light as air.

You know two thousand and one zero’s coming,
And I feel like I’m doing fine.
Soon I'm gonna party like I’m one-hundred-99.

I was dreamin' when I started,
Never thought that I would reach this dream.

Now I’ve lost all those pounds,
But I’ve gained a lot of self-esteem.

People are all talkin’,
They’re saying that I’m looking great.

It’s never fun 2 diet,
But it’s sure fun losing weight.

They say two thousand one zero–party on,
Yeah, it’s my time.
And I’m just gettin’ started cuz I’m one-hundred-99.

Lemme tell ya somethin'
If U didn't come 2 get healthy,
Don't bother followin’ my site.
I got a lion in my heart,
And baby, he's roarin’ tonight.

Yeah, everybody's got a blog,
We could all diet every day.
Thrilled I made this magic happen,
Glad I danced my ass away.

They say two thousand one zero–party on,
Yeah, it’s my time.
So tonight I’m gonna party cuz I’m a-hundred-99.


Dedicated to all my friends who are making (or have made) that magical trip to Onederland.


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32 comments:

  1. GenSeptember 24, 2009 at 6:59 AM

    My new theme song! This is awesome.

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  2. KrysTrosSeptember 24, 2009 at 7:22 AM

    Ha! Love it!

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  3. Jody - Fit at 51September 24, 2009 at 7:47 AM

    Way too great!!!!!! Loved it & yes, being fit & healthy feels great & raises that self-esteem! I love when the guys half my age start checking out their arms to see what they can do to get them like this old fart's arms.. hey, hard work but the payoff is great both health wise & more!

    Congrats Jack for all your hard work!

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  4. bbubblybSeptember 24, 2009 at 7:53 AM

    I really loved this one Jack felt like it was wrote for me. I sadly didn't make it last night to the promise land but I'm going to do it next week for sure. I'll be sure to come and sing your song too *smile*. Thanks.

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  5. ShhhhhSeptember 24, 2009 at 8:18 AM

    Oh, I like this one.

    But Prince is gonna kick your ass! ;)

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  6. Tantra FlowerSeptember 24, 2009 at 8:31 AM

    Great job! Congratulations!!!

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  7. EnzSeptember 24, 2009 at 8:32 AM

    This is my new anthem!!! I can hear it in my head over and over. When I hit 199 - oh so soon - I can almost taste it - I am linking to this post :)

    Thank you for making me smile today.

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  8. I'm Just Another Fat Girl -jafgSeptember 24, 2009 at 8:35 AM

    Hey JS!

    Aren't you glad that Prince changed his name back?

    Congrats, Dude! I really am very happy for you!


    -jafg

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  9. JessSeptember 24, 2009 at 8:38 AM

    I'll save a seat for you here :)

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  10. RebeccaSeptember 24, 2009 at 8:52 AM

    Seriously taleneted lyricist! Congrats on the milestone. Thanks for the giggles!

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  11. AnonymousSeptember 24, 2009 at 9:17 AM

    PERFECT... this is for Lisa today!! She just got there :) Love it Jack!

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  12. Losing it in VegasSeptember 24, 2009 at 9:33 AM

    Love love love it. And yes, I did dance in my underwear! It wasn't pretty :)

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  13. Hope @ Hope's JourneySeptember 24, 2009 at 9:54 AM

    Haha! This is great! When I started out, my first long-term goal was just to get below two-hundred pounds. That was my mantra. I pretty much did dance around when I met that goal. So, I can relate to this!

    P.S. Probably going to have that song stuck in my head for the rest of the day!

    Also, thanks for the comments on my blog! I appreciate them! :)

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  14. LynSeptember 24, 2009 at 10:20 AM

    LOL... this takes me back a few years...

    I cannot WAIT for 199!

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  15. Amazon RunnerSeptember 24, 2009 at 10:51 AM

    And the hits just keep comin'! Jack, I was doing crunches the other day while listening to David Bowie's greatest hits. "Changes" was playing and I kept singing it as, "ca, ca, ca CRUNCHES, time to face the pain." I was cracking myself up while trying to crunch, but since I lack your creative talent, that's as far as I got. If you read the original lyrics, it's custom-made for a Jack Sh*t rewrite. Consider this a request from a fan!

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  16. UnknownSeptember 24, 2009 at 10:54 AM

    whoo hoo! Great Onderland theme song!

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  17. TinaSeptember 24, 2009 at 12:00 PM

    I made it once and I'm on my way back!

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  18. ChristineSeptember 24, 2009 at 12:38 PM

    cute jack. I love prince, maybe you could do one to little red corvette that I could sing in my head while I do the precor.....has a good beat and you can dance to it.

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  19. VRaz60September 24, 2009 at 2:10 PM

    Yippeeeeee damned skippeeeeee!! Very funny, but Prince isn't gonna be pleased that you're getting skinny and will be taking his place on the hit parade.

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  20. Fat DaddySeptember 24, 2009 at 2:23 PM

    From now on I want to be called the flogger formerly known as FD.

    I never could figure out how Prince got som many women. I met him. He is like 5'4".

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  21. karenSeptember 24, 2009 at 3:32 PM

    Quality, not quantity FD!

    Another great one, Jack!

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  22. antgirlSeptember 24, 2009 at 5:27 PM

    I was humming Little Red Corvette when I saw your title, too. Great rewrite of the song, though. :)

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  23. Katie J ♥September 24, 2009 at 5:28 PM

    or $$$ Karen...

    Love it Jack - you are an endless fountain of wit!

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  24. Phil-theincredibleshrinkingmanSeptember 24, 2009 at 5:58 PM

    fantastic rewrite Jack

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  25. AnonymousSeptember 24, 2009 at 8:15 PM

    Um, Jack? I'm reading your weigh-in list of weights, which looks like this:

    Week 22 223.5 - -1.5 lbs.
    Week 23 223.1 - +0.4 lbs.

    Perhaps you've already clarified this, but is 223.5 to 223.1 a .4 lb weight LOSS? Did you already explain this somewhere?

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  26. Cole Walter MellonSeptember 24, 2009 at 9:15 PM

    Thanks for pointing out my sucky mathy skillz.

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  27. theantijaredSeptember 24, 2009 at 9:45 PM

    I was hoping you were going to write about "Raspberry Puree".

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  28. Dayne GingrichSeptember 24, 2009 at 10:10 PM

    FREAKIN LOVING THIS!! WILL DEFINITELY BE FOLLOWING!

    Come check me out... I think you'll like my message, as it directly relates to what you're doing!

    www.coachyourmind.blogspot.com

    -Dayne

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  29. HerradSeptember 25, 2009 at 6:52 AM

    Hi,
    Good post and congratulations on getting fit and healthy.
    Love,
    Herrad

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  30. wildfluffysheepSeptember 25, 2009 at 9:49 AM

    lol. just more genius.

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  31. AnonymousSeptember 25, 2009 at 3:01 PM

    prince is sooooo pretty! thanks jack!

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  32. Greta from www.bigbottomblogger.blogspot.comSeptember 25, 2009 at 7:04 PM

    Ok...I have been stuck (my fault...I take full responsibility..it is not a "plateau" or anything) at 203-205 for a MONTH now....this song is GOOD motivation to get my big ole butt into onederland PRONTO! Damn it! (oooh...you got me all riled up now!) THANKS. And...I am linking to this post when it happens. And...maybe I will wear a thong for my 199 pound butt pic.....HA.....or not......no...I will not do that to everyone. LOL. (ooooh...and now I am delirious) :)

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