Instead of your exercise shoes, you accidently packed a pair of ham sandwiches in your gym bag.- Persistent sample lady at grocery store force-feeds you Triscuits smothered with Cheeze Whiz.
- You’re retaining more water than the Hoover Dam.
- Inadvertently made your sandwich with marshmallow crème instead of low-fat mayonnaise.
- Person you’re having business lunch with wants to meet at some place called “Corn Dog Warehouse.”
- Boss just dropped off plate of still-warm chocolate chip cookies to reward your hard work.
- Doctor prescribes round of steroids “just to see what happens.”
- You must need new glasses; you picked up “1,000 calorie snack packs” instead of “100 calorie” ones.
- Somebody sent you a bouquet of fudgescicles.
- Stuck in traffic jam on expressway, you find a jumbo bag of M&M’s in the glove compartment.
- Somehow your water bottle got filled with gravy.
- When you brush your hair, hunks of cake fall out.
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Accidentally fall face first in chocolate and the only way to survive is to eat your way out.
ReplyDeleteJust got job at cake shop as official taste tester.
Summer birthdays and every one wants to go to your favorite restaurants to eat.
The last two are the BEST!!
ReplyDeleteA few nights ago we grilled burgers (very lean ones. . . totally within my plan), and when I I unzipped my pants to use the bathroom, a little piece of burger literally fell to the floor. . .
No wonder the dog had been jumping me!
That's some funny sh*t! I am trying not to despise you for losing twice as much weight as me in basically the same amount of time...reign in the hate girl, reign it in. Naw, it's hard to dislike someone who makes me laugh so hard I spew my grapes onto the computer. Now pardon me whilst I pick the skins out of my keyboard. Mmm...snack for later?
ReplyDeleteewwwwww gravy from a water bottle.....
ReplyDeleteInadvertently made your sandwich with marshmallow crème instead of low-fat mayonnaise.
ReplyDeleteLMAO Glad I found you're blog, I'm gonna have to follow you now. That was some serious funny.
So are you telling us that the scales are misbehaving? Between this one and the jump rope rhymes I think you are sending a distress signal...do we need a blogger intervention??
ReplyDeletePatty, I've been eating right, excersing regularly, getting plenty of sleep... what's funny or interesting about THAT?
ReplyDeleteYeah...I see what you mean!! :-)
ReplyDeleteHAHAHA ... I'd pass on the gravy.
ReplyDelete